


Until You Pull Too Hard

by arashimoon6



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Bill Cipher/Dipper Pines Fluff, Creative License, Dipper has anxiety, Fluff and Angst, Human Bill Cipher, Hurt Dipper Pines, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure Dipper Pines, M/M, Minor Original Character, Nightmares, Out Of Character Bill Cipher, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Relationship(s), Protective Bill Cipher, Protective Grunkle Ford, Protective Grunkle Stan, Protective Mabel Pines, Tags Are Hard, because he's kind of a softie, he's a big jerk though, i guess, the actual billdip takes a couple chapters to happen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2019-01-15 23:08:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12330681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arashimoon6/pseuds/arashimoon6
Summary: Dipper has just gotten out of a toxic relationship and is just trying to hold it together without letting his family know what really happened. He wonders if it's only a matter of time until they all find out, and worries about what they will think of him. Meanwhile, why is he slowly developing feelings for the resident humanoid dream demon? Now is not the time for such things.Title from "Elastic Heart" by Sia





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I should be working on other things, but I got distracted by feelings. So instead, I'm publishing this emotional jumble that I wrote. This was something I kind of just needed to write, so I didn't put too much detail into some of the background. As a result, Bill is kind of just living at the Mystery Shack, has been for a year, is in human form but still a demon, and is no longer evil. He's kind of declared himself as protector of the Shack and its inhabitants. How that happened can be up to your own imagination. Hope everyone enjoys!
> 
> IMPORTANT: Make sure you read the tags.

Dipper woke up from another nightmare. It was nights like these when he wished he had the courage to tell someone what had happened to him, but he didn’t know how to verbalize it. He didn’t really want to talk about it, and he was afraid of what they would think. For all he knew, they would either accuse him of lying or just call him stupid for letting it go on as long as it did. They might not understand how hard it had been to finally break away. They wouldn’t understand how his emotions blinded him to the truth. He just wanted someone to already know, so they could offer him some form of comfort to help him move on, but that meant he’d have to talk about it, and that brought him back to the beginning.

Sighing, he slowly made his way down to the kitchen to get something to drink and get rid of the dryness in his mouth. He was surprised to see Bill sitting at the table looking at something on Dipper’s laptop. Even though he technically didn’t need sleep, it helped him conserve energy. He’d spend many nights outside, sleeping on the roof. If anyone asked him why he slept out there, he would answer either that he liked the stars or that he felt like he was more able to protect the Pines twins from any outside dangers if he was already out there. Dipper supposed both were probably true.

“What are you doing down here?” Dipper asked him as he got the jug of milk out of the refrigerator.

“It started raining. It’s stopped now, but I was comfortable so I thought I’d hang out in here a while longer,” Bill answered.

“What have you been doing?” Dipper asked as he squirted some chocolate syrup into his milk.

“Just reading some things on the internet about the finer points of being a human. Since you and Star are 17 years old, I’ve been looking at the _Seventeen_ magazine. It’s very strange. I didn’t know so much went into choosing a college, or that it was so important what kinds of people enrolled there. I thought it was more about the things you could learn than the social structure. You never told me, but are you going to college at the end of summer?”

“Okay, first of all, you can’t trust a lot of the information that magazines make up. If you really want to know about teenagers, try just googling stuff and going to different websites to make sure what you’re reading is accurate. Second, no, I’m not planning to go to college.”

“Really? I thought a nerd like you would be all over that,” Bill said.

“No. The college thing isn’t for me. I’m more of a hands-on learning type of guy. In college, you just sit in a classroom for hours and listen to someone talk at you. I can learn more just from walking outside in Gravity Falls. Mabel’s going to college not far from here, though.” There was another reason he wasn't going to the college he’d previously been enrolled in. _He_ had insisted Dipper go there, because that was where _he_ was going. By the time Dipper had severed ties, it was a little late to apply to any colleges. He just withdrew his enrollment from the previous one and decided he’d make the best of not going to college. He hadn’t really been looking forward to the experience, anyway.

“What are you doing down here, Pine Tree?” Bill asked him as if it had just occurred to him what time it was. “I thought sleep was important to humans?”

“I just got thirsty,” Dipper answered. Technically, that was the reason Dipper had gone downstairs instead of staying in bed.

“Is that all it takes to wake you up?” Bill asked in genuine curiosity. He’d been human (kind of) and around humans for a year now, but he still had trouble understanding some things.

“It depends,” Dipper said evasively, refusing to meet Bill’s eyes. “Can you please stop asking questions? I’m too tired for this.”

“Are you okay, Pine Tree?” Bill asked in what appeared to be genuine concern. “I know I terrorized you when you were a kid, but for what it’s worth, I’m here for you now if you need anything.”

Dipper considered himself to be a strong individual. He wasn’t some weakling who cried at the drop of a hat. So, he blamed his next actions on a mixture of tiredness and the lingering fear of his nightmare. Whatever reason he had for it, he was suddenly crying at the words Bill had said. Feeling he was on the verge of collapsing anyway, he allowed himself to crumple into the nearest kitchen chair. Everything – every hurt, every emotion, every physical and mental wound that had come from that bastard Dipper was stupid enough to trust with his heart – felt fresh and open and new and raw, and here was Bill just offering to be there for him, no strings attached, just offering to help in any way that he could. The demon who'd scared him more than anything else 5 years ago was being more supportive than the person he’d thought would always love him more than anything else only a few months ago.

“Pine Tree?” Bill asked, not expecting that reaction at all. He’d never seen Dipper cry before, but he’d seen others, so he knew what it meant. Remembering what had happened last time he was the only one around when Mabel had gotten in a nasty fight with one of her friends, he went forward and started to wrap his arms around Dipper’s shoulders from behind. Dipper’s reaction was once again unexpected.

Dipper felt arms wrap around him, and in the back of his mind, he knew it was Bill. There was no other person it could be. That didn’t connect, though. He was still trying to sort through his feelings that came from _him,_ and now he was feeling strong arms wrap around him. His first thought was that he couldn’t let himself get trapped again. He immediately broke the hold of the arms around him before getting out of his chair so fast that it clattered to the ground. He didn’t stop there. He rushed to the other side of the room, putting his back to the wall so nothing could catch him by surprise. His hands shook as he used them to shield his face. He needed to get away, but he knew he couldn’t run. It wouldn’t get him very far, and it only ever made things so much worse.

He heard someone whisper his name, except, it wasn’t really his name. It was a nickname only one person ever used. It was a nickname he associated with Gravity Falls and an important part of his family and a certain blonde boy (demon, whatever) who always made him feel a little less broken inside. Somehow, against all odds, the words ‘Pine Tree’ had come to equal safety in some small, strange part of his mind

He nervously peaked out at his surroundings. He slowly became aware again of what was going on around him. He was in the Mystery Shack, he was safe, Bill was the only other person in the room, he was safe, he had overreacted, but he was safe. His hands were still shaking, but he didn’t feel the need to run when a figure crouched down in front of him, not touching him this time. “I’m sorry, Bill,” he said quietly.

“I don’t know what you’re apologizing for kid, but whatever it is, it's okay. What just happened? You normally don’t react like that when Star hugs you. Did I do something wrong?” Bill actually seemed to care about the answer to that question.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong. I think anyone touching me in any way would have gotten the same reaction out of me,” Dipper admitted quietly. “Sometimes, I just don’t want to be touched. It’s nothing you’ve done.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Bill asked a little awkwardly. Again, he seemed to actually care what the answer was. He just wasn’t used to this type of interaction.

“I don’t know,” Dipper whispered. He was tempted to, but he was afraid to.

“Do you need anything? Is there any way I can help?” Bill asked.

“This is gonna sound super weird, but do you think you could hold me for a little bit? I know I said I didn’t want to be touched, but it might help, and if I know it’s coming…” He trailed off, not sure how to finished his statement.

“Sure thing, Pine Tree,” Bill answered. He sat down beside Dipper on the ground – when had Dipper sat down? Slowly, Bill wrapped one arm around him, then the other. Dipper leaned into his shoulder and felt himself relax. These arms were safe. They weren’t going to hurt him. Dipper had once thought that about… but this was different. His trust in Bill wasn’t misplaced. He didn’t have to lie about what he did when he spent time with Bill. Bill didn’t make him feel trapped. Bill would listen if Dipper asked him to stop. He didn’t have to act differently around Bill to keep him happy. Bill wasn’t going to make him do anything in return for the hug. The only reason Bill was doing this was to help Dipper feel better because he cared about Dipper and Dipper had asked for this. Bill saw Dipper as a person and _cared about him_.

“Thank you,” Dipper murmured. Bill couldn’t understand how much this meant to him.

“You’re welcome, Sapling,” Bill whispered back. That was a new one, but Dipper liked it. It really made him feel cared for somehow. It was certainly better than _Little Dipper_ , which always made him cringe now.

“Can I ask you something?” Dipper asked.

“Of course,” Bill answered. Somehow, Dipper got the feeling he could have asked for the moon and Bill would have immediately started drawing blueprints for a space ship.

“You’re a dream demon, right? Can you give good dreams? Or at least, keep out the bad ones?”

“If you want me to,” Bill answered.

“Will you have to go inside my head?” Dipper asked nervously.

“Not very far. I could stay on the surface, act as a barrier, if you will. I wouldn’t be digging around or anything.”

“Can you do that, please?” Dipper asked.

“No problem. Come on, why don’t we go up and get you in bed so you won’t wake up sore from sleeping on the floor?”

“Thank you,” Dipper said again. He walked up to the attic with Bill, allowing the other to keep a gentle arm around his shoulders. When they got to Dipper’s room, which he had stopped sharing with Mabel when they were 15, Dipper lay down on his bed, wondering what would happen next.

Bill seemed to hesitate before asking, “Is it okay if I get in with you? I could pull up a chair, but it would be easier if I were right beside you.”

“No funny business,” Dipper warned even as he nodded.

Bill sat on the bed beside him. It was a queen size, so they had enough room. “Now, just relax,” Bill said as he put a gentle hand on Dipper’s forehead. He brushed some of the hair back before resting his hand there. Dipper felt his thoughts calm down as he relaxed before he slowly sunk into an easy slumber. He woke up without having another nightmare.

* * *

The next night, after Dipper announced he was going to bed, Bill followed him out of the living room. “Hey, Pine Tree,” he said just loud enough to get Dipper’s attention.

“Yeah?” Dipper asked.

“I just thought I’d see if you wanted any help with anything?” Bill asked, knowing Dipper would know what he meant while anyone else who heard wouldn't. He had a feeling Dipper didn’t want his family to know about his problems this time.

“I think I’ll be okay tonight, but thank you,” Dipper said, trying to keep the blush from his face. He wasn’t sure why, but his feelings for Bill were starting to change. He wasn’t ready for that, so he was trying to ignore it. He certainly wasn’t going to let on about it to Bill when he was having trouble admitting it even to himself. Maybe this would be easier if Dipper hadn’t just been in _that_ _relationship_ , but he supposed he’d never know.


	2. There Were so Many Red Flags

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After an unexpected phone call poses a real threat to Dipper's well-being, he finally talks to someone about what he's dealing with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's a whole lot longer than the last one, but I'm sure no one minds. I really appreciate the positive feedback I've gotten from people so far. It really encouraged me to keep going with this one since I wasn't sure about posting it at first.
> 
> Chapter title from "Elastic Heart" by Sia (Yes, all my chapter titles from here on will be from songs, but no, they will not all be from the same song).

Dipper went a week without any nightmares, and he hadn’t been thinking about the past that much lately, either. He was proud of himself, sure that both of those things were signs of his moving on. Things took a bad turn, however, when he was working the gift shop one afternoon. They’d been fairly busy, so he was a little relieved when there were only five people inside the shop. Of course, that was probably why he found himself left alone by his coworkers – those coworkers being Mabel, Bill, and Soos. This turned out to not be a very good thing when he was approached by one of the tourists, who happened to be a guy about Dipper’s age.

“Hey there,” he greeted cheerfully.

“Hi,” Dipper answered a little uncomfortably, feeling his skin crawl for some reason. “Can I help you with something?”

“Yeah, actually. I seem to have lost something, and I was wondering if you could help me out.”

“What’d you lose?” Dipper asked, already thinking he didn’t feel like dealing with this. That was hardly his problem.

“My number. Maybe you could give me yours,” the guy said with a suggestive eyebrow waggle.

“You’re kidding, right? I knew better pick-up lines than that when I was twelve. Besides, I’m not interested. Now, if there’s nothing you actually need help with, I need to get back to work,” Dipper said, annoyed.

“I have an idea for some more interesting work you could do,” the guy said, not taking the hint – a hint that Dipper personally thought was hard to miss.

“I said I’m not interested,” Dipper said more firmly, deciding to just walk away. Screw polite customer service. Besides, Mabel was currently the manager, so he wasn’t going to get in trouble for it. Mabel was sure to cut him some slack about this if she found out.

The guy stopped Dipper from going very far with a strong hand around his wrist. “Oh, but I’m interested – very interested. Come on, just give me a chance. You’ll have fun, trust me. Just give me the wheel and you’ll forget you ever thought you weren’t sure about me.”

_“Come on, Dipper. You said you trusted me. Show me you weren’t lying. Let me do this. You’ll like it, I promise. Let me take control like I know you want to and you’ll forget why you ever hesitated. I know what you want, Dipper, even if you don’t. Let me do what I know you desire, and you'll have a good time.”_

_“No, please, I’m tired. I just want to go home and go to bed.”_

_“Oh, we can go to bed, but you’re not going home. Please, show me how much you trust me. Let me do this. You won’t regret it.”_

_“No, I don’t want this.”_

_“Yes, you do, Dipper. Stop fighting it.”_

_“Let go of me! You’re hurting me! Stop it!”_

_“I’m the one in charge here, not you. Now stop struggling, you little bitch.”_

_“Let me go! STOP! No!”_

_“You know you’re enjoying this. Stop lying to yourself. Just give in to me. It’ll be so much easier if you stop fighting it.”_

_“Please stop. It hurts. I can’t take it anymore. I need you to stop. I’m not enjoying this!”_

_“Dipper, we’ve been over this. I’m the smart one, here. I’m the one who knows what you really want. I’m the one who can give it to you.”_

_“Please. Stop. Let me go. Stop it!”_

“…Dipper, come on, calm down. Everything’s fine. Relax. Just breathe. You’re alright. Come on, deep breaths. In... and out. In... and out. In... and out. Good, just like that. There you go, Bro-Bro. Just relax and listen to the sound of my voice. It’s gonna be just fine.”

“Mabel?” Dipper asked, feeling disoriented and lightheaded.

“Yeah, it’s me. You okay, now? You scared me for a minute there.”

“I don’t know,” Dipper said, trying to sort out his thoughts, taking in his surroundings in an effort to speed up the process. He was in the gift shop of the Mystery Shack, but it seemed to be empty except for him and Mabel. That was good, at least. He hated having people stare at him. It made him feel so vulnerable, which he also hated. Everything was quiet, except for the vague sound of yelling coming from outside the door, but that was outside so he wouldn’t worry about it for now. “What happened?” he asked, because he couldn’t think of what else to say.

“I came back into the gift shop to see this guy all up in your space. He kind of grabbed your wrist and you sort of froze. Then you started saying ‘no’ and ‘please’ over and over again. I cleared out the gift shop after that so I could get you to calm down in peace. I think Bill’s giving the guy a piece of his mind, now. Overprotective demon,” Mabel explained, an undertone of humor in her last words that was muted by her worry. “I haven’t seen you have an anxiety attack in a couple years,” she added softly.

That was true. Dipper had dealt with a lot of anxiety when he was younger. He’d gotten past most of it, but it seemed it was coming back. “Sorry to worry you,” Dipper said.

“Don’t apologize, Dipper. Please. This isn’t your fault. That guy’s the one who should be apologizing. He shouldn’t have grabbed you. Do you remember what exactly happened?”

“He was hitting on me. He wouldn’t take no for an answer. I tried to walk away, he wouldn’t let me,” Dipper summarized briefly. There wasn’t much more to tell. He hoped Mabel wouldn’t question his extreme reaction to what could be seen as a small thing.

“That jerk!” Mabel said. “Maybe I should go talk to him, too.”

“No, please, just stay here with me?” Dipper pleaded, wanting desperately not to be alone.

“Of course,” Mabel agreed easily. “Why don’t we go to the living room, though, so we’re more comfortable. Unless, of course, you’re partial to the state-of-the-art wooden floors we have here.”

“Good idea,” Dipper agreed, following his sister through the ‘employees only’ sign. It wasn’t long before Bill joined them.

“You alright, Pine Tree?” he asked with a furrowed brow.

“I’m fine,” Dipper said. He looked down at Bill’s right hand and noticed the skin over his knuckles seemed a little red, broken in a few places. “What happened to your hand?” he asked a second before realizing. Bill confirmed his suspicions.

“I may have punched the guy who thought he could hurt you,” Bill said, looking a little sheepish about it. They had been trying to help him to be less violent. It seemed to be working. He at least didn’t use violent magic anymore. “Hey, this doesn’t have anything to do with…” he trailed off, glancing at Mabel.

Dipper, of course, knew exactly what Bill was getting at. “Yeah,” he said.

“What are you talking about?” Mabel asked in confusion, looking between the two of them.

“I had a nightmare the other night,” Dipper answered. “When I came downstairs, Bill was in the kitchen. He agreed to help keep me from having more nightmares that night. I haven’t had any more since then. Who knows, though. I might have one tonight after what just happened.”

“I can do the same thing again, Pine Tree. It’s no trouble.”

“If you’re sure don’t mind,” Dipper said a little uncertainly.

“I wouldn’t have offered if I did,” Bill assured him.

“Dipper, what’s going on? Nightmares, panic attacks? It’s been a while since you dealt with that kind of thing. You know you can talk to me, right?”

“I know,” Dipper acknowledged quietly. “I’m just afraid to.” He had not meant to say that out loud.

“Why?” Mabel questioned. “Are you afraid of me? Dipper, come on, we’ve been through hell and back together. Nothing could possibly be so bad that you should be afraid of talking to me about it.”

“You’ll think I’m stupid,” Dipper argued.

“Dipper, you’re literally the smartest person I know.”

“If I’m the smartest person you know, then why did I let-” Dipper cut himself off in the middle of his outburst. He couldn’t finish that sentence.

“Dipper, please, I’m not going to force anything out of you,” Mabel said softly. “Just consider talking to me, or someone. I hate seeing you like this. You’ve been all sad lately. I’m worried about you, Dip Dop.”

“I’ll think about it. Right now, I need to get some sleep. I feel like all my energy has been sucked out of me,” Dipper said, which was the truth.

“Alright. I’ll see you when you wake up,” Mabel said, giving him a tight hug. Dipper forced himself not to tense up at the contact.

“Alright. Come on, Bill,” Dipper said, leading the way up to the attic. His last thought as Bill placed that same gentle hand on his forehead is that he hadn’t wanted Mabel to be worried about him, and he needed to make sure he didn’t cause her any more distress.

* * *

A few days later, Dipper woke up from another nightmare. This time, when he went downstairs to get something to drink, it was Mabel who he found in the kitchen. She appeared to be on her fifth piece of dark chocolate. Dipper knew what this meant. Without going into too much detail, he knew it somehow made Mabel’s cramps feel better when they kept her up at night. He didn’t know how, but he had learned to just accept it. He certainly knew better than to comment.

After fixing himself a glass of chocolate milk, he sat down beside her wordlessly. Between bites, she asked him, “Nightmare?”

“Yep,” he answered. “You know, I think we have some edible glitter in the pantry. You want me to get you some?”

“Would you!?” Mabel asked excitedly.

“Sure thing, sis,” Dipper said, going over to get the container of the sparkly mess. “Milady,” he said, as he handed it to her with a flourish.

“Thank you, kind sir,” Mabel replied, smiling a little. Dipper knew she was still worried about him, but he was trying not to give her reason to be. He was handling things just fine without getting her involved. “You know, you can still talk to me if you want. The offer’s always open.”

Dipper internally winced at that. “I’m gonna be alright,” he said truthfully. There wasn’t any point in lying, but there also wasn’t any point in worrying her further by telling her exactly what had happened. He shoved down the voice inside his head that said he was more worried about the possibility that she would stop caring once he told her the truth than the fact that it might upset her.

“If you’re sure,” Mabel said.

* * *

For a while after that, things calmed down again for Dipper. It was late August now, and Mabel was getting ready to move into her dorm room and start college. They were also eagerly awaiting the return of their Grunkles, who were coming back from their summer trip both for the younger twins’ birthday and to help with the Shack again – at least in Stan’s case. Dipper had been feeling better, hadn’t had any nightmares or anxiety attacks, and was generally happier, which also made Mabel happier. Bill was getting closer to the twins, now, and he made sure to keep away any skeevy tourists who looked at Dipper for a little too long. Dipper was hardly going to complain about that. He had finally admitted to himself that he had feelings for Bill, but hadn’t told anyone else yet. He wasn’t sure if he ever would. Part of him did wonder if the reason Bill was so overprotective of him was because the feelings were mutual. Sure, he was protective of Mabel, too, but that somehow felt different.

Once again, as soon as Dipper felt like things were going his way, everything came crashing down around him. “Dude, you got a phone call,” Soos said, holding out the Mystery Shack business phone. Wrinkling his brow in curiosity, Dipper took the phone. It was strange for him to get a call at that number, especially after operating hours.

“Hello?” he said.

“Dipper, it is so nice to hear that beautiful voice of yours again.”

Dipper immediately tensed at the sound of that voice. “What the hell do you want?” he demanded with false bravado, feeling anything but sure of himself.

“I just thought I’d give you a little heads up.”

“About what?” Dipper asked when nothing else was said, feeling himself grow nervous. The voice alone was apparently all it took to accomplished that.

“I’ll be giving you a birthday gift at the end of the month, and I don’t have any intentions of mailing it to you.”

“Stay away from me,” Dipper said, but this time he couldn’t control the shaking in his voice.

“I don’t think you have the authority to say that to me, _Little Dipper_.” The old nickname sent shivers down Dipper’s spine.

“You come near me again, and you’ll regret it,” Dipper said, reigning the shaking in his voice back in. He couldn’t show any weakness. Not to _him_ , not ever again. _He_ had already seen enough of Dipper not standing up for himself.

“What are you gonna do? Throw a book at me?”

“You’ll wish that’s what I’d done if you don’t back off,” Dipper threatened, really hoping his bluff wasn’t called.

“Right. We’ll see who’s making wishes when I get there. See you in a few days, Little Dipper.”

Dipper heard the dial tone and let go of the phone before pulling his legs up onto the couch with him, hugging his knees. He didn’t register the phone bouncing off the couch and hitting the floor. He didn’t hear Soos calling out that he was done for the day and heading home. Nothing clicked until he felt a small hand on his shoulder. He looked up into eyes that matched his own, seeing Mabel sitting next to him on the couch with a hand on his shoulder.

“What’s going on, Dipper?” Something in the way she asked the question let Dipper know that this time, Mabel wasn’t going to stop asking until she got answers. Somehow, she knew things were different now, and they were. This time, there was a real threat that existed outside of Dipper’s own fears and memories.

“I don’t guess you’d be interested in going to Hawaii for our birthday this year, would you?” he asked, wondering if maybe he should just run. It would certainly be easier than facing _him_.

“What? Not really. Why?” Mabel asked.

“Because I’m a coward,” Dipper answered.

“No, you’re not,” Mabel protested, punching him lightly on the shoulder in chiding.

“Yes, I am,” Dipper argued . _He_ was right. Dipper was hopeless at defending himself.

“No, you are not,” Mabel argued back, firmer. “Would a coward jump off a cliff at a giant robot to save his sister? Would a coward fight a video game ninja to defend someone he couldn’t even get along with? Would a coward fight a convicted time-agent, possibly to the death, just to give his friend a shot at having a good birthday? Would a coward defend a mansion full of rich people he doesn’t even like from the most vengeful spirit in all of Gravity Falls? I don’t think so, and you did all of those things and more. You’re no coward, Dipper. Please, just talk to me. Let me help you. You always help me with my problems. Let me return the favor for once.”

Dipper was silent for a few minutes, and Mabel let it continue, sensing her brother needed to think this one out. “Promise you won’t think any less of me?” Dipper asked fearfully, not even looking at Mabel.

“I promise, Dipper,” Mabel answered. She sounded sincere, so Dipper decided he may as well go for it.

“You know how I dated… Matthew during our senior year of high school, but broke up with him before graduation? There are things that happened there that I’ve never told anyone. He did things to me, things I didn’t want. He always said he knew better than me, that I should trust his judgment. The way he told it, I wanted everything that happened to me because of him, but I was afraid to admit it. The worst part is, I believed him. I believed every lie he told me. I believed when he said no one else would put up with me, that I should hold onto him because he was my only shot at love. I believed him when he said that I deserved to be hurt by him. I believed it when he said I was on the verge of losing him if I didn’t straighten up, and I believed that my life would be over if I ever did lose him. I believed him when he said he’d lose it if he lost me, when he said I was the only thing that kept him going, when he said we had to go to the same college whether I wanted to or not because he was more important than me and needed me there more than I could possibly need him anywhere else. I believed that I needed to spend all my free time with him because he wanted me to and I had to do everything he said or I’d lose my only shot at ever having someone outside of my family care about me. It doesn’t make much sense when you look at all of it, but I still believed every bit of it.

“He hurt me, Mabel. He abused me, and he… r-raped me, and he had me convinced that it was okay. It took me so long to finally wake up and end things, because in between the hurt and the pain, he’d tell me how much he loved me, how important I was to him. He showed me affection, holding my hand and kissing my cheek. He’d never look at my forehead, though. My birthmark made him uncomfortable. I shouldn’t have expected anything more, of course. I’d be hard pressed to find anyone who didn’t want to get it removed or covered up, according to him. I was lucky he tolerated the blemish. All the sweet things he’d say on occasion, all the affection, it blinded me to the truth of how he was treating me.

“It finally clicked about the time he started talking bad about you. He’d say stupid things that aren’t true, about how you’re childish and you’re not good for me and you hold me back. He told me that when we went to college I should use the opportunity cut ties completely with you. That’s what snapped me out of it, and I finally had the clarity and the nerve to break up with him. He’s the one in all my nightmares lately, he’s the reason my anxiety has come back.

“I’m sorry I never told you. I just feel so ashamed of myself. I stayed with him so long, even though some small part of me knew things weren’t right. I thought I deserved it. I believed every lie he ever told me. I was so stupid. I should have broken up with him as soon as the red flags started showing up. I saw just about every single red flag I’d ever heard of. I just told myself it was okay, though. I told myself that he was really a good guy, that he was better than that. I started lying to myself and everyone else about what he did to me. I knew if I told anyone the truth, they’d tell me to get away, that he was toxic. I knew if I sat down and looked at things objectively, I’d see that he was bad for me, but I refused to accept it. I just wanted things to be perfect, so I told myself and everyone else that they were. I was so stupid and blind.”

Mabel was crying when Dipper stopped talking and risked a glance at her. After a moment, he realized he was crying, too. Suddenly, he had an armful of Mabel as she hugged him more tightly than he’d been hugged in years. “It’s not your fault, Dipper. You’re not stupid. He’s stupid. He’s a stupid-head and I want to punch his stupid face and bury him out back – after I castrate him.”

“What?” Dipper asked, a little surprised.

“I’ve got a dark side,” Mabel said with a grin.

“No kidding,” Dipper said, letting out a little laugh. He quickly sobered up, though. “You might get your chance, you know. That was him on the phone. He said he’s coming up here at the end of the month. I told him to stay away, but he wouldn’t listen. Mabel, what are we going to do?”

Mabel looked into Dipper’s eyes, and he looked so vulnerable and scared and it just made her want to start attacking stuff. Dipper hadn’t looked that scared since they’d realized Stan’s memories had been erased when they were 12. This was a scared that didn’t come from the supernatural. This was a deeper kind of scared that was personal. She couldn’t allow that. “Dipper, he may have just been trying to get into your head. If he does come here, though, we won’t let him get near you. The Grunkles will be here, Bill will be here, and I’ll be here. We’ll all protect you, okay? You’re gonna be just fine. We’re not gonna let anything bad happen to you.”

“How do I even tell them what happened?” Dipper asked.

“I could tell them for you, if you want,” Mabel offered.

“Thanks, but I think I need to be the one to do this,” Dipper said.

“Well, you only have to tell them as much as you want, you know. You don’t even have to tell them much, really. Just tell them he’s a jerk and you want him kept away from you at all costs.”

“I don’t know, Mabel.”

“Oh, I have an idea. I could wait out in the driveway with my grappling hook, and when he pulls in I could launch it at his car. Then, when he gets out of the car, I could launch it at his face!”

“Mabel, I’m not really sure if violence is the answer here.”

“Violence? What violence? I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Mabel said, the picture of wide-eyed innocence.

“Oh, please. I’ll just talk to the others at some point, try to explain things, and hope they take it well.”

“Dipper, they’re not going to be mad at you because your creepy ex hurt you. That’s not your fault; it’s his fault.”

“I shouldn’t have stayed with him as long as I did. I shouldn’t have even gone on the second date,” Dipper argued, staring down at his knees.

“That doesn’t mean you deserved what he put you through! No one deserves that. Except him. He deserves that. He deserves worse. But that’s just my opinion, what do I know?”

“Maybe you’re right,” Dipper said.

“It’s okay if you don’t believe me. Just, you know, try to think about it. And you can always come talk to me about this. I’ll never judge you for it or call you stupid. You’re the least stupid person I know. Okay?”

“Thanks for being there for me,” Dipper said.

“Always, Bro-Bro,” Mabel said with a small smile. That, of course, was the moment the phone rang. “Ugh, who’s calling now? Don’t people know the Shack closes at sundown?”

“That’s your cell phone,” Dipper pointed out helpfully.

“Oh! Of course! Thank you,” Mabel said. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and answered it cheerfully. “Mabel Pines speaking. What can I do to brighten your evening?... What?!... That’s great!... We’ll be there in a few minutes!... Okay, bye! Love you!”

“Who was that?” Dipper asked curiously.

“That was Grunkle Stan! He and Grunkle Ford just got to the airport. They wanted to surprise us with getting here early, but they need a ride. I told them we’d go pick them up. Do you feel up to it?” Mabel asked.

“Sure,” Dipper said. “This should be fun.”

“Alright! I’m driving, though.”

“What? Come on, how come I can’t drive?” Dipper complained.

“Because I called it,” Mabel said logically.

“Fine,” Dipper said. Arguing with that reasoning would cause the infrastructure of their unspoken sibling rules to crumble, and life was complicated enough without making it any worse.

As the twins made their way outside, neither of them were aware that Bill had heard the whole thing from the stairway. He was already plotting what diabolical things he could do to this Matthew if he dared to try and hurt his Pine Tree ever again. He told himself he would do the same thing if Matthew was Mabel’s ex, and that was probably true, but somewhere deep down, he knew that Dipper being involved changed things. Dipper was changing a lot of things in Bill’s world lately – like the fact that he was feeling emotions more characteristic of humans than demons. That wasn’t important right now, though. Right now, he needed to decide whether mental torture or physical pain would be more effective in this situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what did y'all think? Let me know! I've got a busy weekend coming up so it'll be a few days before you can expect to see anything else posted, but I'll try to post a new chapter at least once a week.


	3. I Feel Marooned in This Body

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tension runs high for Dipper as he anticipates the possible appearance of his ex, and everything somehow leads to certain confessions passing between two certain people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm apparently just not going to have consistent chapter lengths here. I have plenty more written, but this chapter felt complete at this length. The next chapter will probably be up soon, but I'll need to slow down my posting soon so my writing can keep up with it.
> 
> Chapter title from "Trade Mistakes" by Panic! at the Disco

When the younger Pines twins got to the airport, they greeted their Grunkles with hugs that were happily returned. “Hey, we missed you,” Mabel said happily.

“We missed you little gremlins, too,” Stan said as he ruffled Dipper’s hair as if he was still a kid.

“How have things been?” Ford asked them.

“Mostly good,” Dipper said with a smile that was only slightly forced. Mabel shot him a look, but Dipper shook his head. The airport was no place for such conversations. He still had to decide what to tell them and when.

“Well, why don’t we go ahead to the Shack? It’s a little late, and I don’t know about this one, but I’m beat,” Stan said.

“That sounds like a marvelous idea, Stanley,” Ford agreed, already loading a few things into the trunk of the car.

“I’m driving this time,” Dipper declared with a smug look at Mabel.

“I’m okay with that,” Mabel said cheerfully. “I still get shotgun, though,” she said with a stern look at her Grunkles.

“We’re not about to argue with the calling system,” Ford said, putting his hands up in the defensive.

“Good,” Mabel said with a nod. “Let’s get this show on the road, then.”

* * *

They made it back to the Shack in good time since traffic was winding down for the night. They found Bill sitting at the kitchen table on Dipper’s laptop. He used it a lot more than Dipper had originally expected when he gave Bill permission to use it, but he was still okay with it. “What are you up to?” Dipper asked him, trying to look over his shoulder.

Bill immediately lowered the screen so Dipper couldn’t see it. “It’s none of your business,” he said defensively.

“It is my business if you’re doing it on my laptop,” Dipper argued.

“You’re the one who gave me permission to use it for information purposes,” Bill retorted.

“Yeah, but that’s not the same as saying you can hide what you’re doing on it from me,” Dipper replied.

“You never said I couldn’t,” Bill countered.

“Both of you stop fighting. You’re acting like children,” Ford said as he entered the kitchen after dropping his bags off in his room.

“I’m only 17, so I’m still technically a child,” Dipper pointed out.

“Maybe, but you’re also about to be eighteen and you’ve always been mature for your age. Not to mention, Bill is thousands of years old and should be the farthest thing from a child. Although, I supposed he is rather immature sometimes. Regardless, behave.”

“Who put you in charge?” Bill asked petulantly.

“You forget whose name is on the deed to this house,” Ford pointed out.

“Irrelevant information,” Bill argued.

“Hardly,” Ford answered.

“You know, you didn’t do much good in telling us to stop fighting. You sort of just added fuel to the fire,” Dipper said.

“All of you shut up,” Stan said. “It’s too late for this. Just get along. You normally do.”

“Sorry, it’s just been a long day,” Dipper said, deflating a little.

“I’m sorry, too. I’ve been thinking about some things and it’s got my head all funny,” Bill said, which was as close as he was going to come to saying that he was worried about Dipper and it was affecting his emotions, therefore making him generally irritable.

“It’s been a long trip,” Ford pointed out as his own excuse.

“I don’t care why you’re fighting, just don’t,” Stan said as he left the room with a can of soda and a bag of chips. Presumably, he was on his way to go fall asleep watching TV.

Dipper sat down across from Bill. He decided to let the issue rest for the moment, but he was pretty sure Bill didn’t understand internet history or how to delete it, so he was going to check it on his laptop after Bill put it down for the night. “What’s on your mind, exactly?” Dipper asked curiously.

“Just things,” Bill answered evasively. There were plenty of things he openly kept from Dipper, what with him being an ancient being and all, so he was hoping Dipper wouldn’t think anything of this.

“Okay,” Dipper conceded. He slowly munched on a snack as he and Bill spent some time in each other’s silent company, both appreciating that they didn’t need to talk. Later, Dipper checked the history on his laptop to see that Bill had been looking at Oregon state laws. Dipper wasn’t sure if Bill wanted to completely steer clear of crossing a line, or if he just wanted to see how close to the line he could get without getting in some kind of trouble. Dipper decided he wouldn’t worry about it. He had enough on his mind as it was and Bill could clean up his own messes.

* * *

The day before Dipper and Mabel’s birthday, everyone could tell that the younger twin was on edge. He jumped at any sudden movements or sounds, and every time a car was heard in the driveway, he would tense up and look out the window for several seconds before relaxing. Mabel finally pulled Dipper aside around lunchtime. “Dipper, are you okay?” she asked.

“No, I’m not okay,” he answered, frustrated. “I’m afraid of my own shadow and I can’t even relax because I’m just waiting for _him_ to walk through the door and start harassing me the moment I’m alone! I should be handling this better but I’m just terrified.”

“Dipper, it’s okay to be scared. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s more than understandable in this situation. We have no way of knowing when – or if – he’ll show up. Just know that I’m here for you, and if he gets within a few feet of you, I’ll break his face. You’re safe here, Dipper. Nothing is going to happen to you with all of us around. I’ll even make sure I’m within shouting distance so I can come if you call for any reason whatsoever, even if you just need some company.”

“Thanks, Mabel,” Dipper said. After a moment, he told her, “I think I’m going to talk to Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford after the Shack closes today. I’ll probably include Bill in that, too. It would make me feel better if they were all keeping an eye out for him.”

“You want me to be there?” Mabel asked.

“Please,” Dipper answered.

“Sounds good, Broski,” Mabel said with a smile. After that, Dipper felt just a little lighter for having had a talk with his sister. The world could throw anything it wanted at him because as long as he had Mabel on his side, he would be okay in the end.

* * *

Later that night, after everyone had finished eating (even Bill, who didn’t actually need to eat but chose to anyway), Dipper cleared his throat to get everyone’s attention before they started getting up from the table. “Hey guys, I need to talk to you about something,” he said shakily. He had to do this. He was scared to death but he knew what he wanted to say and he knew it would be best to just get it over with now. He had to tell them sometime, and delaying the inevitable had never gotten him very far in the past.

“Is everything alright, Dipper?” Ford asked in concern, noticing how nervous Dipper clearly was.

“I don’t know,” Dipper admitted. “There’s something that may be happening soon that I think you should all know about so you can be prepared.”

“We’re all ears, kid,” Stan said, giving Dipper his full attention.

“My ex-boyfriend called to let me know he was planning to come visit for my birthday but I really don’t want to see him because he was kind of an abusive rapist,” Dipper said all in one breath. Okay, so that wasn’t half of what he had been planning on telling them, but it was close enough. He couldn’t look at his family as he waited for their reactions, sure that he should have eased into his explanation a little bit better. Too late, now.

“What’s his name?” Ford asked in a steely voice. Dipper relaxed minutely at realizing any anger wouldn't be directed at him.

“Yeah, and where does he live? I want to pay him a visit,” Stan added.

“I’m not telling you where he lives, but his name is Matthew Avery. I don’t know if he’s actually going to show up – he could have just been yanking my chain – but I’m still nervous.”

“We’re not gonna let him hurt you, kid,” Stan said.

“Agreed,” Ford answered. “If he does show his face here, I know a few ways to deal with people who hurt my family.”

“You know, you could get a restraining order,” Bill spoke up. “It would only take a couple of days, and then if he came within a certain distance of you, he would have to serve jail time and pay some pretty steep fines.”

“That doesn’t help us out with tomorrow,” Dipper said.

“Dipper’s right. We’ll just be aware of our surroundings and be prepared to… take action against this… individual. Dipper, if you’d like, one of us could stay with you at all times for the next few days.”

“No, I don’t want you to have to go to all that trouble for me,” Dipper protested.

“Dipper, it’s really no trouble. We’d be happy to do anything that makes you feel safer. We don’t want you getting hurt any more than you do,” Ford reassured him.

“I shouldn’t need you guys in order to feel safe,” Dipper said. “I shouldn’t even be in this mess. I never should have let this happen or turn out like this.”

“Kid, listen to me,” Stan said, looking Dipper in the eye. “Just because some asshole hurt you doesn’t mean you’re weak or whatever it is that’s going through your head right now. You may not feel like it, but you’re one of the strongest people I know – and if anyone here tells anyone I said that, you’re on bathroom duty for the next month. And Dipper, it’s not your fault, either. This is all on him.”

“Thanks,” Dipper said. He wasn’t sure if he believed it, but he knew he could start to believe it in time.

“I know this is hard, Dipper, and none of us could begin to understand what you’re going through, but please understand that if you ever need to talk to anyone, we’d be happy to listen,” Ford said.

“Thanks, Grunkle Ford,” Dipper said. He couldn’t believe his own relief at the reaction from his Grunkles. As Dipper got ready for bed that night, he felt like a bit of the weight had been lifted from his shoulders. There was a small, niggling thought in the back of his mind that wanted to break the surface, but he just couldn’t put a name to it. He was just about to drop off to sleep when it finally clicked.

Several days ago, Bill had been looking at Oregon’s state laws on Dipper’s laptop. Now, he was offering advice on what legal action could be taken in this situation. There was no way that was coincidence. Feeling angry at the invasion of privacy, Dipper got out of bed and hastily made his way to the ladder that led up to the roof. “Bill!” he shouted, getting the demon’s attention.

“Jeez, Pine Tree. You don’t have to shout; I’m a light sleeper. What brings you up here in the middle of the night?”

“You eavesdropped on me and Mabel during a very serious conversation! Why the hell would you do something like that?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Bill denied.

“Then how come you just magically know about restraining orders the second I tell you I have a crazy ex?”

“It’s like you said – magic. I’m an all-knowing being of pure energy, kid,” Bill said flippantly.

“Then how come you needed me to teach you how to use the internet so you could gain information? You may know some things, but not modern human stuff. Just admit it, Bill. I know it’s the truth. Why were you listening in on us?”

“I didn’t mean to, okay?" Bill faltered. "I saw you were upset and was about to go check on you when Shooting Star beat me to it. I decided to wait and see if she needed any help, and then you started talking. I knew I needed to walk away, but I just couldn’t. I wasn’t trying to invade your privacy or spy on you. I was… worried about you.” Bill couldn’t seem to meet Dipper’s eyes as he finished.

“I don’t know if I can believe that, Bill. Sure, you protect us, and you seem to care about us, but this should be a small thing compared to some of the things you’ve seen considering how long you’ve been alive,” Dipper said skeptically, wanting to hold onto his anger. It was easy to be mad at Bill right now. It distracted him from the big issue.

“Pine Tree, I promise I’m telling you the truth.”

“Why? Why do you care about something that happened to me in what equates to about .02% of your lifetime?”

“Because you’re more important to me than anything else has ever been!” Bill said. He apparently hadn’t meant to say that, because his eyes went wide and one hand went over his mouth as if he could put the words back where they came from.

“What?” Dipper breathed, feeling as if everything was suddenly moving in slow motion. Surely that didn’t mean what he thought – hoped? – it did.

“I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to, and I don’t want you to think I’m saying this to make you feel better because of what’s going on, or to take advantage of you for the same reason, but I care about you more than everyone else – differently from everyone else. I’m still trying to figure out exactly what this means, but I think I… have a crush on you?”

Dipper didn’t know what to say. Should he confess that he felt the same? Or should he act like he was indifferent? He didn’t feel like he was ready to jump back onto the relationship horse yet, but just because they both knew they each liked each other didn’t mean they had to date each other, right? Bill did say he didn’t want Dipper to do anything he didn’t want to do, so he would probably respect Dipper’s wishes to not take things anywhere yet. Deciding he would hope for that, Dipper finally said, “I feel the same way.”

“Wait, really?” Bill asked.

“Yeah, I mean, have you seen yourself? You’re, like, the embodiment of sexy!” Dipper burst out. He felt his face turn a little red as he hadn't meant to phrase it quite like that, but he didn’t stop talking. “You’ve also been nothing but nice and helpful and protective and, dare I say, easy to get along with since you became human and started living here. I mean, you’re still annoying and you get on my nerves a lot, especially when you finish all my chips before I’ve even had a chance to open the bag, but even Mabel does things that get on my nerves sometimes. I enjoy spending time with you, and you make me feel safe, and you help me with nightmares no questions asked, which helps a lot right now, and you make me laugh and I just like you, dammit.”

“Of course I eat all your chips – they’re shaped like triangles! I love triangles!” Bill defended himself. He hesitated before asking, “You really mean all that, though?”

“Yeah, I do,” Dipper said. “I don’t think I’m ready to be in a relationship yet, though. I need some time. We can still hang out, but we’ll still just be friends for now. Is that okay?”

“That’s fine,” Bill answered. “I can wait as long as you want me to. I know I don’t always act like it, but I can be patient - especially if I'm still allowed to spend time with you.”

“Thank you,” Dipper said quietly. “That means a lot to me.”

“It’s no trouble, Pine Tree,” Bill answered. “You should probably get some sleep now. It’s getting late and birthdays seem like they tend to require a lot of energy. If you want, I can go with you if you’re worried about nightmares?”

“If you’re sure you don’t mind,” Dipper said.

“I wouldn’t have offered if I did,” Bill said with a small smile. “Come on, let’s go.”

They made their way down the ladder into the Shack before going up to Dipper’s room. Already in his pajamas, Dipper immediately climbed under the covers and got comfortable, waiting for Bill to sit beside him on the bed. It didn’t take long, and soon enough that soft hand was back on his forehead, over his birthmark, soothing him into a peaceful sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone enjoyed it! Feedback is awesome!


	4. You Never Could Control Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matthew finally gets what's coming to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is: the chapter you've all been waiting for. The summary says it all. Maybe I should warn for violence? I don't think it's too bad, especially considering what Matthew did to Dipper, but it's not pretty. I tried to throw in a little poetic justice, too. We also get to be reminded of the fact that Bill is an actual demon who is not always nice, so that's fun. (I was going to wait a little while to post this so I don't get ahead of myself, but it's ready so what the hell, right?)
> 
> Chapter title from "Far Too Young to Die" by Panic! at the Disco

The following day, Dipper and Mabel hosted all their friends from Gravity Falls at the Shack, supplying all manner of sodas and snacks. There was a table set up off to the side for gifts to be placed on, and music played loudly over the speakers. There was predictably a lot of 80’s style music as Mabel had been placed at the head of the party planning committee once again. Dipper was just glad he wasn’t having to participate in karaoke this time.

As he looked around him, he saw Candy, Grenda, Soos, Wendy (who had taken a day off work at her cousin’s place), Pacifica (who had gotten better after that haunted party at her mansion), Robbie (who had matured and become less obnoxious), Bill, Stan, Old Man McGucket, a few of the older kids they’d become friends with through Wendy, and Quentin Trembley (who made a special visit to Gravity Falls each year just for the twins’ birthday, still riding a horse backward after all this time).

“Where’s Grunkle Ford?” Dipper asked Mabel after he didn’t see the man anywhere.

“I think he went to get more soda,” Mabel answered, gesturing to the refreshments table where it was clear they were low on drinks. “He shouldn’t be much longer.”

“Okay. Just wondering,” Dipper said as he surveyed the room again. He couldn’t help it. He didn’t want to be caught by surprise if someone unwelcome showed up. He wanted to see _him_ before he himself was seen. Maybe he was paranoid, but he had a right to be. There was every reason to believe that _he_ could show up at any moment.

“Hey, Pine Tree,” Bill called, approaching him. “How come there’s no cake this year? I thought that was a big thing.”

Dipper look at Bill oddly. “There is a cake,” he stated.

“Where is it?” Bill asked, looking around the room again as he asked the question.

“I’ll show you,” Dipper said, leading the demon over to the refreshment table and pointing to a flat, red box with a plastic window in the top. “That’s the cake.”

Bill looked inside the box to see a brown disc that was covered with what looked to be icing that spelled out ‘Happy Birthday Dipper and Mabel,’ with Dipper’s name in dark blue and white, while Mabel’s was in purple and pink. “That's not a cake,” he said.

“It is – it’s just different from what we normally have,” Dipper explained patiently. It was almost cute how confused Bill could get about human things sometimes.

“But it’s all flat,” Bill protested. “Cakes are supposed to be way bigger than that thing.”

“It’s a cookie cake,” Dipper said. “That means it’s basically a giant chocolate chip cookie that some people prefer over eating layers of sweet bread stuff, so they use this instead of regular cakes for celebrations. I prefer cookie cakes, while Mabel likes regular cakes, so we alternate which one we have every year. Last year we had a regular cake, this year we have a cookie cake.”

“That’s so cool!” Bill said, going from skeptical to excited in 0.2 seconds. “A giant cookie! That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard of, and I’ve heard of a lot of things. How do you eat it? How do they make it? Wouldn’t it burn on the edges or something? Does it taste like a regular cookie?”

Dipper had never seen Bill act quite like this. It was almost like he was a little kid. He was practically bouncing up and down at the idea of a giant cookie. Dipper couldn’t wait to see the demon’s reaction to actually getting a slice handed to him. “Well, some people eat it with a fork while some pick it up and eat it with their hands, which is what I do. They make it like a regular cookie as far as I know and it just cooks evenly. To me it tastes a little sweeter than a regular cookie, but that could just be from the icing on top of it.”

“When do we get to eat some?” Bill asked. He had yet to stop staring at the cake.

“I don’t really know. Mabel’s the one who planned this whole thing. You’d have to ask her,” Dipper said.

“I’ll ask her later. I have one other question. What’s the big deal about 18? I could be wrong, but it seems like people are making a big deal about that. Is it because it’s an even number or something?”

“That’s because in Oregon, and almost everywhere else in America, when you turn 18, you become a legal adult. A lot of times this doesn’t mean much, but it does mean we can vote, get tattoos without parental consent, and a lot of times it opens up better job opportunities. There are other things that go into it, but that’s pretty much it,” Dipper explained.

“Interesting,” Bill mused. “Why 18, though? Seems like 20 would make more sense, since humans make such a big deal out of being teenagers these days.”

“I have no idea,” Dipper answered. “You could probably look into it.” Dipper looked to see that Ford had come back with more soda so he excused himself to get something to drink. He was nervous about what could happen tonight and it was making his mouth all kinds of dry.

He was just screwing the cap back onto a 2-liter bottle when he felt someone tap him on the shoulder. He turned around to see the one thing he had been expecting all night yet hoping would never happen. There _he_ stood, looking like he had every right to be there. Since Dipper had last seen him at graduation, he had grown a bit of a beard and let his hair get longer, and it seemed he’d dyed it from a reddish brown to a dirty blonde, so it would have been easy enough not to recognize him. Dipper had seen him so often and knew his face so well that plastic surgery would be the only thing to keep him from realizing who he was looking at. Forcing down his fear, Dipper asked, “What do you want?”

“I want to have a conversation with you. I think outside would be a good place, don’t you?”

“No, I don’t think it would be. I don’t want to talk to you at all. I don’t ever even want to see you again. Just leave me alone, okay? You’re not welcome here. You should leave in one piece while you still can, because I guarantee that if anyone here recognizes you for who you are, they’ll tear you apart.”

“Oh, Dipper. Tell me you didn’t talk to them about what happened between us. That won’t end well for you. I’m sure you told them the same lies you told yourself about how you didn’t want me to treat you that way. You know as well as I do that you like it rough. I was just giving it to you like you wanted. There wasn’t anything I did to you that you didn’t fantasize about at night.”

“No,” Dipper said. It wasn’t true. Nothing Matthew said was true. He was a good liar, but a liar nonetheless.

“Oh, please. I know you Dipper. You’re just a naïve little child who doesn’t know what he wants and needs me to show him. I’m the smart one here, remember?”

“Leave me the fuck alone,” Dipper spat out, knowing he was slowly losing his grip on calmness.

“Is that really what you want? Do you really want to be all alone like you have for the last few months? I can give you so much. You just have to let me.” Matthew moved marginally closer to him.

“I’m not interested,” Dipper said. He risked a glance away from the person in front of him to see if any of his family was nearby, but Mabel was deep in a conversation with Candy and Grenda, and his Grunkles seemed to be in some kind of debate about the broken piece of railing on the stairs.

A rough hand gripped his jaw and forced Dipper to face the lead role in his nightmares. He knew he shouldn’t have looked away. He should have kept his guard up. “Look here, Dipper,” Matthew sneered, “if you don’t do what I say, I’ll show everyone you know those pictures I took.”

Dipper winced. He’d always dreaded that threat. Matthew had taken pictures of Dipper doing certain compromising things later on in their relationship. Dipper hadn’t realized the pictures were taken until it was too late, and Matthew had refused to delete them no matter what Dipper said, once again insisting Dipper trust him. What was he supposed to do now? He did not want those getting out, but he knew things would get so much worse if he left the Shack alone with Matthew. He’d be lucky to come back alive.

Dipper had looked away from Matthew again as these thoughts went through his mind, but he was brought back by a stinging slap being delivered to his cheek. “Look at me when we’re having a conversation, Dipper. I’ve told you this. You really do need me, don’t you? How else are you going to be taught how to be polite instead of displaying this rude behavior that seems to come so naturally to you?”

“Hey!” Dipper heard a shout from somewhere to his right. He turned to see Mabel approaching from where he’d seen her a minute ago. “Get your filthy hands off my brother you pervert!” It took only a few seconds for Mabel to cross the short distance and then she was immediately shoving Matthew off of Dipper. _Why didn’t I just do that?_ Dipper wondered briefly even as he watched Mabel throw a successful punch at Matthew’s face when he tried to shove her back. “You stay away from him,” Mabel said through gritted teeth.

“What are you gonna do, Mabel?” Matthew said, saying her name like an insult. “There’s nothing stopping me from doing to you what I did to him.” Apparently, he was done playing innocent.

“Think again,” said Bill, approaching Matthew from behind. When Matthew turned to look at him, he said, “So, you must be the guy who hurt Pine Tree.”

“I’m sorry, Pine Tree?” Matthew asked with a sneer.

“Dipper,” Bill elaborated. “You knew who I meant, though. Although, I guess I wouldn’t be surprised to learn you hurt most of the people you come into contact with. That’s not important right now, of course. What’s important is that you listen to what the lady said and you back off from him, as well as every other member or friend of the Pines family.”

“Why should I?” Matthew challenged.

“Because if you don’t I’ll only hurt you more,” Bill answered.

“Wait, more?” Matthew asked, caught off guard for a moment.

“Yeah, more,” Bill answered before using some strength from his physical human muscles but a lot from his demonic abilities to land a punch to Matthew’s face that knocked him backwards a good few feet. “You should know that there are only a select few people in the world I care about,” Bill said as he continued to rain down blows on various parts of Matthew’s body. Unused to being the one under attack, Matthew wasn’t sure how to fight back, so he didn’t. As Bill was a demon, it really wouldn’t have mattered anyway. “You should also know that I don’t take kindly to any of those people being hurt in any way, shape, or form,” Bill continued. “You hurt one of those people, so understand that I am very angry with you.” By now, most people had stopped what they were doing to watch what was going on. No one made a move to stop what was happening. “I am not a nice person when I am angry,” Bill growled, now hovering over Matthew, who had been knocked completely off his feet and was curled up on the ground, motionless but still conscious. “You had no right to do what you did, and if you ever think about pulling that bullshit again, I’ll make sure your very soul is tortured until it fizzles out of existence.” Bill continued to cause damage to the pathetic excuse for a human being below him with no signs of stopping.

“Bill, stop!” Dipper suddenly yelled. He had frozen about the time Bill started throwing punches, surprised at both how passionate Bill was being with protecting/avenging Dipper and at how passive Matthew was being all of a sudden. Now it looked like Matthew could only take a few more hits before he was dead, and Dipper didn’t want to have to explain that one to any authorities. They’d have a lot of cleaning up to take care of if Matthew died there. What do you even do with the car of a murder victim? Or would it really be murder in this case? Perhaps they could call the cops and plea self-defense. Though, no one else was visibly hurt so that may not pan out very well.

Knowing he couldn’t let Bill kill anyone, and certainly not in front of so many witnesses, Dipper moved forward and placed a hand on Bill’s shoulder. Bill immediately stopped and turned, ready to hurt whoever was trying to stop him, but his eyes softened at the sight of Dipper. “You have to stop this,” Dipper said. “You’re going to kill him.”

“So?” Bill asked.

“So, he would miss me if I was dead, even if he won’t admit it,” Matthew rasped out, even as he lay bloody and bruising on the floor.

“Hardly; I just don’t want to have to clean up or hide this,” Dipper explained. “If we kill him, things get complicated.”

“I won’t kill him, but I’m not finished,” Bill said. By now, some of the crowd had dispersed and left, sensing this wasn’t something they needed to see and respecting the Pines family enough to let them handle things. To those who remained to gawk, Bill said, “Could you give us a minute?”

“Maybe just give us the rest of the night? We’ve got a lot to deal with,” Ford said, trying to be polite but unable to completely disguise the anger he was feeling in the moment. Everyone left without a word. They heard the sound of cars pulling out of the driveway not long after.

“Now, there are a few things you need to understand,” Bill said as he looked down again at Matthew, the first human he had intentionally harmed in a while. “The first is that no one messes with Dipper Pines and gets away with it. The second is that you are going to leave Dipper Pines alone, or I will permanently mark on your forehead, the palms of your hands, and the soles of your feet that you are the lowest human being to ever exist. I will curse you to never be able to speak again except to tell others what mistakes you have made. I will make it so that your death is the slowest, most painful death in all of human history, and I will make good on my promise to torture your soul into oblivion. All this can be avoided, but only if you never hurt the Pines family again. This means no harassment, no stalking, no blackmailing, and certainly no other kind of contact. You might find it wise to just stay out of Oregon. I hear Australia can be nice.

“I'm still not done, though.” Bill snapped his fingers, and there was the brief sound of popping before Matthews hands went to his crotch. “Guess you won’t be having kids,” Bill mused. “One more thing, and then I’ll leave you to the older Pines twins.” Bill snapped once more before saying, “Now, every time you hurt someone, even accidentally, whether physically or emotionally, you will feel twice the amount of pain they do. He’s all yours Sixer, Fez,” Bill said, stepping away.

The older Pines twins looked at each other. They seemed to come to an unspoken agreement before they hoisted Matthew up between them, stripped him down to his underwear, tossed him out the front door, and slit the tires to his car in front of him. “Have fun getting home,” Ford told him.

“And thanks for the car,” Stan added, dangling the keys in front of Matthew. They watched until he had gone out of sight before going back into the Shack and then down to the basement to see how the kids were doing. They found Dipper sitting in a chair, Mabel beside him and holding him close while Bill stood not far off, ready if they needed anything but giving the twins the space he knew they needed. “How are they?” Stan asked so the niblings wouldn’t hear.

“I think they’re going to be okay. Obviously, Dipper’s still going to need time, and Mabel is angry and worried, but I think time will do a lot of good for all of us on this one.”

“How are you?” Ford asked Bill. It was strange, but he didn’t feel much animosity towards the demon anymore.

“I’m fine, Sixer. I’m not the one whose heart was just trampled all over.”

“Good to know,” Ford answered. “I wasn’t sure you had a heart,” he quipped.

“Funny,” Bill said, unhurt. “I’m gonna go clean my hands up now that you’re here.”

Meanwhile, Dipper was trying to process everything that had just happened. Matthew hadn’t hurt him beyond that slap, and he was relieved, but he was still pretty shaken from having been face-to-face with Matthew, from having people watch at least a part of their interaction, from feeling that rough and unforgiving hand on his skin again, from his family finally interacting with Matthew with the knowledge of how he’d treated Dipper, from seeing Bill act so violently and being subsequently reminded of the demon’s nature, and from how many emotions he felt just from seeing his family be so fiercely protective of him. Mabel rarely did anything physically violent against someone else, so the shove and following punch had surprised him a little. His Grunkles hadn’t exactly caused Matthew any pain – anything more might have been overdoing it – but they did force him to struggle home nearly naked. Dipper was sure Matthew would be too embarrassed about what had happened to him to tell anyone about it because, well, Dipper was pretty sure Bill had castrated him, and no one wanted to explain that one to a doctor.

Thinking about it, Dipper wasn’t as afraid of Matthew, having seen him have his ass handed to him by Dipper’s loved ones, but he still never wanted to see that face again. He almost felt guilty for being the cause of that much pain and humiliation being brought down on another human being, but Matthew probably deserved it. Besides, if he had left Dipper alone today, he never would have had any trouble. If Matthew had just stayed home, then he wouldn’t have been hurt. Then again, if Dipper had never gone on a date with Matthew, Dipper never would have been hurt either. Was Dipper as bad as Matthew? No. Dipper hadn’t done anything to deserve what had happened to him. He’d just wanted to be loved. God, it sounded pathetic. It was the truth, though, wasn’t it? Dipper had just wanted a boyfriend who cared for him. There was nothing wrong with that. There is something wrong with showing up to your ex-boyfriend’s birthday party and harassing him after being told to stay away. Everything Matthew ever did with Dipper was wrong. Dipper didn’t deserve what happened to him, while Matthew probably did.

“You okay, Dipper?” Mabel asked, pulling Dipper from his thoughts.

He nodded his head where it rested on her shoulder. “I’m alright. I’m still kind of processing everything, but I’m okay.”

“How’s your cheek? I heard him hit you – that’s what brought my attention to you. It must have been hard for me to have been able to hear it over the music.”

“It still hurts,” Dipper admitted. “How does it look?”

He lifted his head off of her shoulder so he could face her. “It looks like you might end up with a black eye,” Mabel said.

“I’ll live,” Dipper said dismissively. He almost said he’d had worse, but knew that wouldn’t get a good reaction.

“I could heal that for you, you know,” Bill offered, having returned.

“Yes, please,” Dipper immediately accepted. He’d like to not be reminded of this every time he looked in the mirror until the bruise healed. He was going to be thinking about it enough as it was.

Bill sat in the chair on the opposite side of Dipper from Mabel and slowly reached up his right hand before placing it gently on Dipper’s cheek. Dipper saw a brief flash of blue out of the corner of his eye before the pain was completely gone. “Thank you,” he said softly with a small smile.

“Don’t mention it, Pine Tree,” Bill answered with a small smile of his own.

“I think I’m gonna go to bed, now,” Dipper said. “I’m a little tired after all that.”

“Goodnight, Dipper. Call us if you need anything,” Ford said, giving Dipper a one-armed hug.

“I will,” Dipper answered as Stan ruffled his hair before Mabel gave him a tight hug. “Bill, will you help me out again?” he asked a little shyly.

“You got it,” Bill said with a nod, standing up to follow Dipper up to his room in the attic once again. “See everyone in the morning,” he called back over his shoulder. He wondered if Mabel would have to explain what he was helping Dipper with to her Grunkles.

Dipper's last thought as he fell asleep that night was that he wasn't out of the woods, but he was making progress, and he found a strange sort of comfort from the fact that he had - sort of - faced Matthew and survived it. He could do this, he finally concluded.


	5. Found Something Real That's Out of Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few days in the Shack and some slight developments in a certain relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it's been over a month. For that, you all have my sincerest apologies. Real life's been hitting me with some crap, so fiction had to be put on the back burner. I didn't even realize it had been quite this long since I'd posted a chapter. I will try my hardest not to let it go this long again, but I'm not sure how consistent I'll be able to be as things are still settling down.
> 
> Apologies for how cliched some of this is, as well as how OOC some characters probably are.
> 
> Title from "Not About Angels" by Birdy

The next morning, Bill watched the sunlight filtering through the window as it fell on Dipper’s face, giving his skin a slight glow and glinting in his hair, showing subtle red highlights. He couldn’t help but smile at the sight. The more time Bill spent as a sort-of-human, the more he became fascinated with humans in general. There were some – like Matthew – who were worse than a lot of demons, but even still, humans were amazing creatures. Their capacity for emotions alone was unlike anything Bill had ever seen anywhere else. He used to consider that a weakness, but after experiencing such things himself, he could honestly say he believed that the way humans dealt with their emotions so easily was a show of strength. He’d certainly had difficulty controlling his reactions to things at the beginning of his stint as a human.

Dipper, though… Dipper was the most beautiful human Bill had ever encountered, and there’d been a fair few. Over the past year, since he’d been forced into a human form, he’d stayed at the Shack so Sixer could “watch” him. He’d resented it, had made their lives hell as much as he could, all the while complaining about how bored out of his mind he was. Fez had heard enough, and after winning an argument with his brother, told Bill he may as well earn his keep and get busy in the gift shop. Bill hated to admit it, but he had grown to enjoy the work.

For some reason, he got a strange sense of enjoyment from restocking the pine tree hats and hanging up more question mark shirts. It was also fascinating, in some strange way, to watch as people fell for the overt falseness of the so-called attractions. Then he delighted whenever anyone saw through the farce and called Fez on it. It gave him hope that there was more than 1% of human life on earth that was intelligent. He also loved the look on “Mr. Mystery’s” face as he was publicly accused of being a phony and as people abandoned their potential purchases, glaring at the sputtering man as they made their way back to their cars.

When he heard that the younger Pines twins were visiting for that holiday humans in America have where they eat food and call it a celebration of gratitude, he hadn’t bothered to hide his excitement – no one needed to know there was more to it than the prospect of twice as many humans for him to irritate after hours. He’d been thoroughly threatened by both of the older twins – separately – that if he antagonized or even dared to terrorize either of the niblings, he’d either find himself blasted to the M Dimension and anchored there for the rest of his days or be forced to spend a week in the outhouse the tourists used. Bill had agreed not to do anything to them beyond talking. That still allowed for him to be obnoxious and gave him a chance for mind-fuckery, so he'd considered it a win.

His plans hadn’t stuck for long – the power of Shooting Star was strong. Obviously against Pine Tree’s wishes, she had immediately started treating him as any other human her age - as a friend. Against his own wishes, he found the girl’s infernal friendliness to be contagious. He’d ended up striking up a strange, cautious friendship with Star, and after that Pine Tree could only give him the cold shoulder for so long. When the twins came back again for Christmas – for a whole month this time – their friendship had gotten stronger. Mabel and Bill had even shared their concern with each other over the way Dipper seemed withdrawn, and how he’d mysteriously disappear for an hour every day. That had all stopped after only a week, however, making them both reach the conclusion that Dipper had sorted out whatever it was he’d been dealing with. They had all grown closer that month, especially after they fought that shapeshifter.

During Spring Break, the twins had come to visit once again, and this time Pine Tree had bags under his eyes. He seemed happy enough, but it felt fake to Bill. Star didn’t seem concerned, though, so Bill had brushed it aside. He’d thought about just going into Pine Tree’s mind to check on him, but even though it would have been with good intentions, just the thought of that kind of invasion of privacy had made Bill feel guilty. Curse humanity.

Now, he wished he’d done something back then. Maybe it would have broken Pine Tree’s trust, but maybe he could have put an end to that relationship and the pain it brought the kid sooner. Bill sighed. Even he of all beings knew that there was no such thing as changing the past, so there was really no point in dwelling on the could-have-beens and the what-ifs.

Bill was pulled from his thoughts when brown eyes slowly fluttered open in reaction to the light streaming down on them. He quickly looked away before Pine Tree could notice his gaze, pretending he’d been staring blankly at the wall ahead of him before looking down at his face as if he hadn’t just spent a half hour doing that.

“Bill? What time is it?”

“9:30 in the morning.”

“Okay. Thanks for staying with me again last night.”

“Kid, for the 335th time, I don’t mind. I don’t do anything I don’t want to do.”

“Oh, so you enjoy working in the gift shop, then?” Dipper said with a smirk.

“No comment,” Bill answered, smiling internally when that got a laugh out of Dipper.

“Alright, well I’m hungry so let’s go down for breakfast,” Dipper said, rolling out of bed before stretching, relishing in the feel of his back and shoulders popping after a solid night’s sleep.

“Sure thing,” Bill said, following Dipper downstairs.

* * *

 Over the next few weeks, Dipper found out the hard way – through many failed attempts – that he couldn’t sleep without Bill there to keep the bad dreams away. He hated how weak that made him feel, but he didn’t know what he could possibly do. It was like he couldn’t stop thinking about Matthew now that he’d had that encounter with him. Bill kept saying he didn’t mind, that it was no trouble, that he didn’t like Dipper having nightmares any more than Dipper did, but Dipper couldn’t help but feel like he was inconveniencing the demon. He gave up trying to protest the assistance after he realized Bill wasn’t going to stop as long as he knew Dipper wasn’t sleeping well, and Dipper didn’t want to lie to the demon.

Amidst his trouble sleeping, Dipper was still at war with himself over his feelings for the demon. The fact that he was willing to sit up all night to keep Dipper’s sleep peaceful only made his affection grow, but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to feel...  _all that_ about anyone yet. He was afraid that if he allowed things to develop into a relationship, Bill might use that as an opportunity to show them all that he’d been playing them the whole time, and Dipper didn’t think he’d be able to handle another betrayal. Rationally speaking, he doubted that would actually happen, but not all fears are rational.

He also didn’t want this – whatever it was – to turn into a rebound relationship; those were never good. He was vaguely concerned that his feelings for Bill may have purely stemmed from the fact that he was an attractive guy who wasn’t a jerk to Dipper, that maybe he was comparing Bill to Matthew because he was just grasping for someone to replace Matthew in a positive way, that if he hadn’t just gotten out of that relationship he wouldn’t even see anything in Bill. He didn’t want that to be the precursor to his new relationship. He didn’t want it to have any effect on what he did or didn’t do with Bill, but he was afraid it was the instigator.

He had confessed all this to Mabel over the phone and felt better for hearing what she had to say on the matter. “Dipper, you can’t just forget about what happened to you, and it’s probably going to affect you for a while, but that’s okay. All the big things that happen to us shape who we are, especially relationships, whether they’re good ones or bad ones. If you’re not changed by both the good and the bad things that happen, you may as well be a robot - or worse, another Dippy Fresh. Just try to learn from it in a constructive way. It doesn’t have to affect you negatively, but you can’t keep it from changing you. I think the fact that you’re even thinking about a relationship in the first place is a good sign – that bastard didn’t turn you off of all men for the rest of your life, and that says something really great. There’s nothing wrong with moving forward with caution because you had a bad experience, especially with how self-aware you seem to be about this. Just do what you think and feel is right, and I’ll back you all the way. And let me know if I need to have a talk with Bill about anything, alright?”

“I hear you,” Dipper had answered with a soft smile, glad to have Mabel.

“By the way, how long has this little crush been going on, anyway?” Mabel had asked with a suggestive tone in her voice.

“I don’t know,” Dipper had said honestly, blushing all the same. He'd been glad she couldn’t see it.

“Wait, are you two getting up to anything while he’s going up to your room every night?” Mabel had questioned suspiciously.

Dipper’s blush had intensified. “No, of course not!” he'd said. “That’s exactly what I’ve told you it is, alright? No, just no. I’m not ready for that yet anyway, even if I was ready to date him.”

“Okay, just keep me updated on everything that goes on there, alright?”

“Sure thing, Mabel," he'd responded, even though he was a believer in the fact that some parts of a relationship should remain private. He hadn't felt like explaining that to Mabel in the moment.

* * *

 That night, Dipper climbed into bed and watched as Bill sat beside him, back leaning against the headboard. He reached over to place his hand over Dipper’s forehead again, but Dipper stopped him. “Hang on a minute,” he said.

“What’s up, Pine Tree?” Bill asked, resting his hand on the bed instead.

“I don’t feel much like sleeping just yet,” Dipper answered hesitantly.

“You just not tired or is something on your mind?” Bill inquired curiously.

“A bit of both,” Dipper said vaguely.

“Well, I’ve got an idea, then,” Bill said. “Come on.” He got off the bed, holding a hand out to Dipper. Curious, Dipper got out from under the covers and stood as well before taking the demon’s hand. He was led down the attic stairs before Bill let go of his hand when they reached the ladder that led out to the roof so that he could start climbing up.

Once both of them were standing on the shingles that had been replaced after Dipper raised the dead at the Gideon’s-in-jail celebration/karaoke party, Bill took Dipper’s hand again and pulled him along until they were both sitting with their feet dangling over the edge. Without thinking about it or what it could mean, Bill put an arm around Dipper’s shoulders. The night air was just cold enough that Dipper felt inclined to lean onto the blond.

“I’m gonna sound like some poetic sap when I say this,” Bill began, “but the view really is great out here, especially at night. You can look out at the trees, if you squint you can make out the lights of the town in the distance, or you can look up at all the stars. I didn’t just sleep out here so I could protect the house – really, that’s crap because if I’m going to know something's coming, I’m going to know it's coming whether I’m outside or not. I’ve been going through a little bit of crap myself – nothing like what you’ve got going through that noggin of yours, of course – but I’ve been alive a long time as a two-dimensional demon. I saw a lot and did a lot and never thought twice about it. Something about becoming a different type of being entirely – regardless off the fact that I still have some of my powers – becoming mortal and getting anchored to a single dimension that’s not my own, a dimension I tried to overtake and bring destruction down on, it’s just made me reevaluate some things. Of course, it could just be the whole human emotions thing, and those stupid hormones I have to deal with now. Either way, being out here just helps me clear my head,” Bill confided. He hadn’t meant to ramble quite so much, but he felt like it got his point across well enough.

Dipper smiled at Bill. “Thanks, for telling me that and for bringing me out here.”

“Don’t mention it,” Bill said nonchalantly.

They sat there for a while longer in silence. It was so peaceful, but not crushingly so. There was the chirping of crickets, the croaking of the occasional frog, the hooting of an owl in the distance, the random flash of yellow from a lightning bug, and the soft sound of the wind in the surrounding trees. Bill was definitely right. The atmosphere up there was soothing. The body he was leaning against didn’t feel half bad either.

Without thinking, Dipper sat up a little straighter, looked into Bill’s eyes, and was suddenly kissing him. It started out chaste, just lips against lips, but then one of Bill’s hands went into Dipper’s hair and Dipper wrapped his arms around Bill’s neck and someone gasped and their tongues met.

Dipper had just started thinking that Bill was a damn good kisser for someone who hadn’t been human for more than a year when the reality of what he was doing hit him and he jerked back in shock. Bill didn’t stop him from pulling away, which was good, except Dipper pulled back so hard in his shock that he lost his balance and tumbled off the roof with a yell.

“Pine Tree!” Bill shouted. A split second after Bill reminded himself he wasn’t _just_ a human, blue flames surrounded Dipper and suspended him in the air, 5 feet from the ground below him. Slowly and gently, Bill brought Dipper back up to the roof and set him down in the middle of the flat area they’d been sitting on together. He had a strange urge to check and make sure that Dipper was alright, but felt like touching him might not be the wisest move in that moment.

Dipper refused to look at Bill. What had he done? “I’m sorry about that,” he muttered.

“About what?” Bill asked, not sure what Dipper should be sorry for.

“About, you know, what I did just then, before I fell of the roof.”

“You mean the kissing?” Bill asked bluntly.

“Right.”

“No need to apologize,” Bill soothed him. “I didn’t have a problem with it or I would have stopped you.”

“Right,” Dipper repeated, scratching at the back of his neck.

“Pine Tree, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Bill tried to reassure him.

“I… Okay.”

“What’s the matter?” Bill asked, not really understanding Dipper’s behavior.

Dipper sighed. That had been a good kiss, but even though he had started it, he didn’t feel like he’d been ready for it. Or maybe that had been his subconscious telling him he was? He was feeling so confused about everything. He wanted to try things with Bill, but he was just scared to. He shouldn’t be. Bill was actually a decent person now. Bill was doing all kinds of things to show he cared about Dipper. Dipper just couldn’t stop thinking about what could go wrong, though. He hated that. He wished he knew what to do. Maybe if he could take a peek at the future. He’d just need to go back to when he was twelve and talk to Blandin before he got sent back to 1883, but if he could go back to when he was twelve he wouldn’t need Blandin to begin with. Why was everything so confusing? “I just don’t know what to do about this,” Dipper finally said.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I want to be with you, be in a relationship with you, but I’m afraid at the same time and I don’t feel ready, but I don’t know if that can change without me proving to myself that there’s nothing to be afraid of, which will mean conquering my fears, and it’s just this complicated loop,” he tried to explain.

“We won’t do anything you don’t want,” Bill said gently. “I swear to you right now, whether we do the whole relationship thing or not, the moment you tell me you don’t want to do something, or you’re uncomfortable with something, it’ll stop, okay?”

“Okay,” Dipper said. “Could you maybe give me a few more days to think about things?”

“Take all the time you need; I mean that.”

“Thanks.”

“You ready for bed, now?”

“Sure.”

Even as he fell asleep, Dipper was cursing himself for being so awkward. That whole thing had been a disaster.

* * *

 Dipper spent several days thinking through it all, going over his options and the dangers or drawbacks of each of them. He spent time talking to Mabel when she came home that weekend. She had scolded him for not immediately telling her about their kiss on the roof – how cliché was that anyway? – before grilling him for details about how it had been. After that, she’d been nothing but encouraging. It was after a late-night talk with Ford (he and Stan had decided to stay around in Gravity Falls for a few months) down in his lab that Dipper finally decided he would take a risk and ask Bill on a date the following day. He went upstairs to find Bill watching a fight on TV with Stan, told Stan goodnight, and went upstairs with Bill. He laid down not having a clue that what happened in the next few hours would put an end to all thoughts of a date with Bill.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope that was worth the wait. Minimal editing was done, so please let me know of any glaring grammatical errors.
> 
> I'm thinking about putting together a prequel about the previous year completely from Bill's POV. I hadn't even planned on addressing that time at all, but now that I have I want to expand on it if anyone would be interested in reading about it.
> 
> Let me know what you think!


	6. I Walk Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An encounter with some of Gravity Falls more unsavory creatures puts a hold on Dipper's plans for his future with Bill and create a slightly long-term problem for him to deal with.
> 
> WARNING: Dipper has a dream that may be disturbing to some readers. It's not too terribly graphic, but it's not pretty. If you think this might bother you, don't read the text in italics aside from the section at the very end of the chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am truly sorry for how long it took me to get this up. I've had a LOT going on irl. I hope everyone is doing well, and I hope you will find this chapter worth the wait. Thank you if you were here for the first chapter and are still here to read this one. 
> 
> Chapter title from "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day

The inhabitants of the Mystery Shack woke up at around 3 in the morning to the sounds of falling trees and the feeling of the earth shaking. They all rushed to meet each other in the living room in their pajamas. Dipper was still surprised that Ford wore a turtleneck even when he slept, but he knew better than to comment.  “What’s going on?” Ford asked.

Of course, none of them had the answer to that question, so they all moved to the windows that looked out onto the front yard. What they saw was an actual herd of gremloblins – something that was unprecedented as far as any of them knew. “I thought these things traveled alone,” Stan directed at his brother.

“So did I,” Ford told him grimly. “I’d like to remind you all now not to look into any of their eyes,” he warned as they continued to watch the green, fungi-covered creatures wreak havoc on their yard. A few were drawing closer to the Shack, and one was already working on one of the support beams of the front porch.

“How do we take ‘em down?” Stan questioned.

“We have a few options,” Ford said. “Does anyone have tranquilizer darts? I just ran out this week and haven’t had a chance to order any more.”

“Oh, sure. Let me just get them out of my bedside drawer,” Stan answered sarcastically.

“That’s a no, then?”

“Yes,” Stan said with a roll of his eyes. “Fireworks I have; tranquilizers I don’t.”

“I could probably try to take them out,” Bill suggested. “I’m not as powerful as I used to be, but I still have a few aces up my sleeve. What weaknesses do these guys have? I know water is bad, but what about fire?”

“I’ve never tried fire,” Ford admitted.

“Well, then we’ll start there,” Bill decided. He reached for the doorknob, but a hand fell on top of his.

Dipper looked at him closely. “Be careful,” he said quietly.

“Anything for you, Pine Tree,” Bill declared with an easy smile before he stepped outside, closing the door behind him.

Dipper and his uncles watched anxiously as Bill attacked the first creature he came to successfully, sending it off the porch and into the woods screeching thanks to its singed skin. The only problem this really posed was that it brought all eyes to Bill, who quickly started moving away from the Shack in an attempt to help keep the others out of harm’s way.

He started sending fireballs at them, rotating continuously in the process. Most of them found their marks, but some creatures still stayed unharmed. The injured ones fled, but the uninjured ones closed in on Bill. The ones left inside all waited anxiously to see if they needed to intervene, not wanting to go in prematurely and get in the demon’s way. For a moment, it seemed everything would be fine.

Then it went wrong. Bill missed one, and it got too close for him to actually throw anything at it. He tried punching it, but he was the only one who got hurt by the impact.

The last gremloblin, possibly the biggest one that had been there, picked Bill up in its claws. Dipper felt his face grow cold and heard his blood rushing in his ears, remembering that those things had neurotoxins in their claws. He looked at his family to see if they had any ideas. He was surprised to see Ford holding a gun. Stan had a baseball bat and his brass knuckles. They could help.

“We have to go out there!” he whispered frantically.

“We won’t be able to get in a good shot if it sees us. We’ll all just be knocked out of the way,” Ford pointed out, though he seemed a little frantic himself.

“We can’t just watch while it kills him. I have an idea. I’ll distract it while you guys take it down,” Dipper said.

“No, it won’t work,” Ford protested. “There’s no way for it to possibly be distracted that much. It has an amazing sense of smell and we’d be directly upwind of it.”

“Trust me, I know what I’m doing,” Dipper insisted. Before anyone could say anything else to try to stop him, he wrenched the door open and hurried over to where the monster was holding Bill in its grasp. Bill had his eyes firmly shut to avoid accidentally looking at the glowing yellow orbs near his face. The gremloblin seemed to be squeezing him increasingly tight.

One thing Dipper knew for sure about a gremloblin was that once they were looking in someone’s eyes, they didn’t stop until the person was completely gone to whatever nightmare they were living. One thing that he hoped was true was that he’d already survived his worst nightmare – both in real life and in his sleep – so it should take a while for him to actually lose his mind. That would be enough time for someone else to knock the gremloblin out if not kill it. Then both he and Bill would be released.

“Hey! Over here!” he shouted, waving his arms. He immediately had the attention of the green creature and met its eyes without hesitation.

It was a strange sensation to be awake and yet pulled into a dream by an outside force. It was a little like when they had all gone into Stan’s mind their first summer there, only it made his stomach drop a little more and nausea swept over him quickly. He quickly lost awareness to the fact that he wasn’t really living what he was seeing. It was horrifyingly immersive, and he lost all sense of self.

* * *

The next thing Dipper was aware of was a feeling like his body being dunked in cold water, and then he was gasping for air, sitting upright and flicking his eyes all around himself. He was in Mabel’s room downstairs, on her bed. Stan was in a chair next to him, slumped over with his arms resting on the bed and his head resting on his arms. He must have fallen asleep waiting on him to wake up. On his other side, Bill was also laying on the bed, also asleep. He wracked his brain trying to figure out what had happened, but he couldn’t remember anything past the stew they ate for dinner. He could tell _something_ was wrong, though.

“You’re awake,” said a soft voice from the doorway. He turned to see Ford entering the room. “You’ve been out for 3 and a half hours, now. Stanley was getting worried. I was, too. What were you thinking?” He kept his voice low, but Dipper could tell he was a little pissed.

He stared down at the blankets as he said, “I don’t remember what happened.”

Ford’s expression softened. “You did something stupidly heroic to save Bill last night. A group of gremloblins attacked the Shack. He went out to take care of it. There was one left when he was grabbed by it. Things were looking rough. You told us you were going to distract it so we could take it down, but you didn’t tell us how. We couldn’t stop you from running outside and looking it right in the eyes. I shot it until it died - took a lot of shots, I might add. You passed out as soon as you lost eye contact, and Bill did the same when he hit the ground. He has some cracked ribs and some bad bruising. There don’t seem to be any serious head injuries, so he should wake up soon. If he doesn’t we’ll call a doctor. How are you feeling?”

“I still don’t remember any of it,” Dipper told him honestly. “I just feel a little tired, but I’m fine other than that.”

“That’s a relief. Whatever it was you saw when you looked into the eyes of that monster couldn’t have been good.”

“Have you talked to Mabel since this happened?” Dipper asked worriedly.

Ford chuckled. “I know better than that. She probably would have been on her way here before I hung up the phone if I had. There’s nothing she could have done to help, and she only would have been worried about you. I’ll call her later to let her know what happened _after_ we’re sure you’ll be okay. Perhaps tomorrow evening after her last class is over.”

“That’s probably best. I think she had a biology exam tomorrow morning at 10AM, and we wouldn't want to mess with her focus,” Dipper said with a wry grin.

A groan beside him turned his attention to Bill, who seemed to be waking up. He mumbled a few unintelligible words before looking up at Dipper. Realization dawned on him and he scowled at the brunette. “What were you thinking?” he asked sternly, unknowingly repeating Ford's words.

“I don’t know! I don’t remember!” Dipper answered defensively, more awake than he was when his great uncle had asked him.

“Well, next time don’t put yourself in danger. I didn’t know if you were gonna be okay.”

Their conversation woke up Stan, and he asked Dipper the same question everyone else had, getting the same answer as well. “Well, you’re both on bed rest for today,” he declared firmly.

“Fine with me,” Bill groaned after seemingly trying to sit up. Dipper thought he might have been planning to demand he be allowed to move around freely before he realized he wasn't physically capable.

“Is it bad?” Dipper asked Bill in concern when the grimace of pain didn't leave his face.

The blond gave him a tender smile and shook his head. “I’ll be alright by tomorrow morning,” he said with certainty. “We know from experience that I heal pretty quickly.”

Although he nodded his head, Dipper wasn’t completely convinced. The look of pain that had been on Bill’s face when he tried moving was stuck in his head, and he started to feel extremely guilty.

The feeling of guilt only grew as he spent the day next to Bill in bed. They hooked the Wii up to Mabel's TV so they could play Mario Kart to drive away the boredom, but Dipper’s mind wasn’t on it. Rather, he was focused on trying to remember what had happened. He could only ever remember flashes of images, but he came to the conclusion that Bill (and himself) wouldn't be injured if the demon hadn’t been so preoccupied with keeping the bad dreams out of Dipper’s mind. It had been a month of that – maybe it was time Dipper learned how to handle that problem on his own.

He knew he wouldn’t be able to convince anyone to let him sleep on his own that night, so he didn’t say a word when, after he said he was going to sleep, he felt the soft skin of Bill’s palm on his forehead. The following night would be different, he promised himself.

* * *

Bill spent the day after they were released from bed constantly worried about Dipper. Physically, he seemed fine. On a different level, he looked both exhausted and miserable. He was quieter than usual and didn’t raise a single complaint when someone asked him to do something. He wanted to ask what was wrong, but he didn’t want to invade his space. Instead, he settled on dropping a comment while they ate lunch. “If there’s anything that’s bothering you,” he’d said, “you know you can talk to me about it.”

The human had looked surprised when his words had registered, but then he’d shaken his head. “I’m fine, Bill. I’m just a little tired.”

“Alright, Pine Tree,” Bill conceded, not wanting to push. He just hoped Dipper would heed his words before he started spiraling.

He got really worried that night when Dipper stopped him from following him upstairs. “Bill, I think I’m good tonight.”

“What?” Bill asked in confusion.

“I’ll be alright on my own tonight. You can sleep wherever you want – on the roof, the couch, Mabel’s room. I’d like to be alone tonight, if you don’t mind.”

“Are you sure?” Bill checked, although once again, he didn’t plan to push Dipper. If the kid said he needed space, he felt obligated to respect that.

“I’m sure.”

“Well, if you change your mind, I’ll be on the roof,” Bill told him. “Goodnight,” he added before heading for the ladder.

“Night,” Dipper repeated. He made his way up to the attic feeling a little guiltier for pulling the I-need-to-be-alone card, but it had been the best way he could think of to make sure Bill agreed. He couldn’t help exactly what impression Bill got from the statement. Furthermore, it was for the greater good. They wouldn’t be taken by surprise again, and no one would get hurt again. His problems were from the past, he couldn’t be surprised by them, he could learn how to deal with them.

_He was sinking in an ocean that was lemony yellow. His limbs were too heavy for him to struggle to the surface, and his lungs were having trouble finding air. Before his despair and panic could grow too great, he saw a white light below him. Somehow, he knew that if he could reach it, he would be out in the air again – he would be free. It was getting bigger, which had to mean it was getting closer._

_There was a jerking sensation in his stomach, and he was suddenly hurtling backward rather than downward. He couldn’t see where he was going, and that alone was terrifying. Combined with the fact that he was losing sight of the white light, his situation had just changed drastically for the worst._

_Without any warning, he stopped moving. He closed his eyes and braced for impact, but nothing happened. He opened them again to see if anything had changed, and felt his heart-rate pick up when he saw that everything had._

_He could breathe freely, but he seemed to be in a dark room. There was a soft glow he couldn’t find the source of. It allowed him to see the concrete walls of the room, the slowly rotating blades of the ceiling fan above him, and the lack of any doors or windows._

_When he tried to move to get a better look at the room, he realized an even bigger problem. He couldn’t move. His wrists and ankles were secured to hold him in a spread-eagle position. He was laying down on a bed, and he hadn’t even realized it. Worse - his clothes were gone._

_A bone-chilling chuckle jolted his attention to his right. There were two other beds, and each had another person laying on it in the same fashion as him. A man stood between them, fully dressed and grinning with sharp teeth. He held a knife in one hand and a lit candle in the other. His eyes glowed yellow. “Little Dipper,” he greeted in a voice that seemed to surround him from all sides. “I see you’re awake.”_

_Dipper wanted to shout at him, to ask what he wanted, to scream in fear, to cry for help, but he realized he’d been gagged. Too many memories were flooding his system and he nearly threw up._

_“I have some information for you. There are three people in this room other than myself. The first is you. The second is your simpleton of a sister. The third is that freak of a demon-boy who said he likes you. I’m going to give you a choice now. One person in this room is going to be set free. One person will get to be my assistant. One person will be given my and my assistant’s attention in whatever way I decide. Who would you like to play each role?” Matthew asked with fake cheerfulness_

_There was a long silent pause. Well, it was almost silent. Dipper could hear the fearful, muffled whimpering of the other two._

_“Looks like you’ve reached the time limit, which makes it my choice,” he said with a widening grin. The shadows on his face darkened. “You all get to be the third person. I’ll do everything myself and no one gets to leave. I think we’ll start with blondie and get him out of the way since he’s not really my type.”_

_The candle was set down on a table that hadn’t been there before. Dipper was forced to watch helplessly as something was carved into Bill’s flesh. Despite the muffled quality of Bill’s screams, they were deafening in Dipper’s ears. He struggled so hard against his bonds that he felt blood run down his arms._

_It got worse. The knife was put aside. Hands were touching Bill. They started digging into the cuts, deepening them messily and bringing more blood to the surface. After they got bored of that, they began to leave gentle strokes along shivering flesh that tried to shy away. A tear rolled down Dipper’s cheek, but he kept pulling at his wrists._

_He almost cheered when a hand came painfully loose._

Dipper shot awake in bed, sweaty and panting for breath. His stomach rolled and his hands shook. There was a long moment in which he had no idea where he was or why he felt this way, but then everything came rushing back – both the night the gremloblins had been in their yard and the dream he’d woken up from. He realized that had been what he’d seen when he faced the gremloblin, now. Only, there had been more. He couldn’t remember the rest, but he knew that he hadn’t seen all of it that night. He also knew there was no way he was going back to sleep.

Fumbling, he pulled his laptop off the bedside table and into his lap. He logged into Netflix and found an anime he’d been meaning to watch, knowing that he couldn’t re-watch anything if he wanted to stay awake. He’d be miserable tomorrow if he didn’t get any more sleep, but he wouldn’t risk having the rest of that dream played out in his mind. Perhaps tomorrow night he would try again.

* * *

Bill paid careful attention to Dipper the next day, trying to discern how well he’d slept the night before. When he’d asked, Dipper had given him a flippant, “I slept fine, Bill.” He wasn’t ready to take his word for it, though.

The boy seemed… well enough. He was functioning like a normal human, able to hold a normal conversation, eating regular amounts of food. There was no tangible reason for Bill not to believe what he’d said, but something just didn’t sit right with him.

In an effort to keep an eye on Dipper, Bill tried to spend more time with him. There wasn’t much he could change since he already worked with him and ate all his meals with him, but he started watching Netflix with him late into the night. They were watching Attack on Titan together. Dipper had already seen it, but Bill was completely new to it. He was hooked by the time they were on the third episode. Not long after that, he started thinking that maybe Dipper was really doing okay.

* * *

Dipper had nightmares almost every night. He watched as his attempts to get free were foiled every time. He watched as two of the people he cared about most suffered until it was his turn. Every night, he would wake up and boot up his laptop so he could watch one of his shows. He started and finished Yuri on Ice in the same night. Stranger Things took him about four nights. He was nearly halfway through Fullmetal Alchemist when the nightmares all but stopped. For future reference, he wrote down his own theory for why this happened in his own journal.

_I was eye-to-eye with a gremloblin a week ago. I don’t know how long it lasted because I passed out, but I understand that the gremloblin who caused me to face my worst nightmare was killed during the time I was unconscious. I have no memory of the event, but I have felt certain after-effects I wasn’t expecting._

_Every night since the event, I had a nightmare. Each night it was the same one, although the same events didn't happen. It was like a movie that I watched when I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was paused, and it resumed in the same moment the next time I fell asleep._

_Last night, the dream ended. It was not a happy ending. Every character, so to speak, died except for the antagonist. Although the most recent dream was the most unpleasant, I am glad it happened. The nightmare is over. I can move on with my life more peacefully. A part of me feels stronger for having overcome this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	7. You'll Never Know if You Don't Ever Try Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new development for our two boys, but it doesn't go quite as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone is having a lovely week and had a wonderful Labor Day weekend. If not, maybe this update will somehow help. I tried to make it cute. Enjoy!
> 
> Chapter title from "Hallelujah" by Panic! at the Disco

Things finally felt like they were slowing down and getting normal… as normal as anything could be in Gravity Falls, at least. The two Stans left on October 1st to get back to their investigation of anomalies throughout the world. Dipper and Bill now had the Shack to themselves outside of tourist hours. Stan, of course, had addressed this with Bill before he left with his brother.

“You look after him, you understand? And if you hurt him, you’ll wish you were dead.”

“Yes sir,” Bill had said soberly. “He won’t come to any harm if I can help it.”

Now they were gone, and the two teenagers were watching movies on the couch. It had recently come to Dipper’s attention that Bill had never seen a single Disney movie, and he’d immediately resolved to fix that.

They were between movies – having just finished Big Hero 6 – when Dipper decided to _finally_ talk to Bill about something that had been on his mind for weeks. “Hey, Bill… I was wondering if you’d want to go out for dinner this week,” he spoke up.

“Sure, Pine Tree,” Bill answered with a chipper smile.

“But, like, as a date,” Dipper clarified, not certain that Bill had understood what he’d meant. He probably should have led with that. There was nothing like being specific.

“Oh.” Bill faltered for a second. He didn’t say anything after that, making Dipper feel like he was losing his mind. He’d made it awkward, hadn’t he? He’d just ruined his chances of going on a date with Bill. Now Bill would take back what he said. There would be no date. Bill would tell him thanks but no thanks. Things would never go back to the way they were only a few seconds ago. Dipper shouldn’t have messed with the status quo.

“I-I’d love to,” Bill finally said, poking a hole in the previously inflating balloon of Dipper’s anxiety. “When and where would you like to go?”

This was the part Dipper had never really made a decision about. Now that he was breathing normally again, he was able to really think about the possibilities. Since they already lived together, Dipper couldn’t invite him over to hang out – that would just be another day in the life. They rarely left Gravity Falls, though… “What if we went to Portland?” he suggested.

“What’s Portland? Are there just a lot of ships there or something?”

Dipper giggled. “No, not exactly. It’s just a big city in Oregon. It’s also where Mabel’s college is. We’re a couple of hours away from it here. It might be fun to get out of Gravity Falls for a change. We could look up fun things to do there this week and then go next Sunday when the Shack is closed.”

“That sounds great!” Bill said. “Can we go for a full day?”

“Sure. We’ll leave here around 8:00 and come home whenever we decide we’re tired,” Dipper agreed.

* * *

Saturday evening, once the Shack had closed for the day, Dipper and Bill sat together on the couch. Dipper’s laptop was open on the coffee table in front of them while they searched the internet for the best things to do in Portland. “What about this? The world’s smallest park?” Bill suggested.

“That kind of sounds a little sad,” Dipper replied, shaking his head.

“I think it sounds cute,” Bill countered. “We don’t have to go, though. Let’s keep looking.”

They continued scrolling, skimming their options. “Oh, I like this one,” Bill said, hovering the mouse over the ‘Keep Portland Weird’ sign.

“We’ll do that,” Dipper agreed with a nod. He put it on the list he had on his phone. They were going to turn it into an itinerary once they had everything picked out and mapped out. Even if Bill wasn’t aware of that, yet.

“The witch’s castle in Forest Park,” Dipper read aloud, looking at the ramshackle stone building. “Can we do that?”

“Sure, Pine Tree,” Bill agreed, watching Dipper type it in. He made a mental note to check ahead of time and make sure the place was actually safe. Gravity Falls wasn’t the only town that wasn’t completely normal.

“We have to go to this bookstore,” Dipper declared, looking at the website for Powell’s Books.

By the time they were done, they had a decent list of things to do. The list now included all of the things they’d already mentioned, as well as Multnomah Falls, the Japanese Gardens, the Museum of Science and Industry, the Troll Bridge, and Mount Tabor. They were both excited about everything they had planned. “I guess I’m gonna go to bed now,” Dipper decided once everything was planned out.

“Alright. Sleep tight, Pine Tree,” Bill told him with a gentle smile.

Dipper stood up and moved towards the stairs, hesitating with one foot on the lowest step. Should he talk to Bill? Tell him what had happened while he was insisting he was alright sleeping on his own? Take care of that one last secret before they went on their first date tomorrow, clear the air? Get it off his chest? Ask Bill to help him again so he could sleep with the 100% assurance of safety again? Swallow his pride and admit that he’d lied?

Definitely not.

* * *

Dipper slept well Saturday night. He and Bill woke up early to get ready to leave. At breakfast, Bill surprised Dipper with some flowers that he put in a vase on the kitchen table. Dipper was pretty sure the vase was new, too. At least, he didn’t remember having one that was bright yellow and suspiciously wider at the bottom than it was at the narrow top. He wouldn’t call it a triangle, but only because there weren’t enough sharp angles or points. Naturally, there was a black bow tied around it.

“Thank you,” Dipper said with a blush, taking a sniff of the blue and yellow roses.

“Anything for you, Pine Tree,” Bill said warmly.

Breakfast was relaxed, and soon enough they were on their way to Portland with Dipper behind the wheel. “You know where you’re going?” Bill checked.

“You just stay on the highway and follow the signs,” Dipper assured him. “Oh, Mabel texted me back last night. She’s gonna do lunch with us.”

“Sounds good. I’ve missed Shooting Star,” Bill said cheerfully.

“Me, too,” Dipper agreed. It had been too long since he’d seen his sister. Even though this was a date, they had all day and had decided to see if Mabel wanted to meet up with them. Dipper was happy that they had. “Hey, do you think we should save Mount Tabor for last? I read that the view is great there at sunset.”

“I like the way you think,” Bill approved.

They rode in silence for a while, happy to listen to the radio playing. Since Bill would listen to literally anything, Dipper was in charge of the music selection.

At the halfway mark, they filled up their gas tank and then got back on the road again, pulling out behind a pickup truck.

They were locked in a debate about which Disney movie they would watch next 20 minutes later. A crate appeared on the road in front of them without warning. There wasn’t enough time to stop, not enough time to swerve around it safely. They ran right into it, making a crashing sound on impact. Dipper let out a yell, Bill doing the same, and then they were rolling over to the shoulder of the road. Dipper put the car in park. “You okay?” he checked.

“Yeah, you?” Bill asked.

“Sure,” Dipper said through a sigh, feeling a little shaky from the shock of something so unexpected happening on the road. “We should check the damage.”

They climbed out of the car and saw the mostly-smashed remains of the crate on the road behind them. They walked around to look at the front of the car. The bumper was dented, and there was a little paint missing. A small part of the crate was lodged under the car. Something must have punctured the front left tire somehow, because it was flat. “Well this is just great,” Dipper grumbled.

“It’s not that bad, Pine Tree,” Bill said. "Can’t we just replace the tire and keep going?”

“We could if I had a spare,” Dipper complained. “I never replaced it the last time I got a flat. We’ll have to call someone and wait for them to come help us.”

“There will still be enough time,” Bill placated.

Pulling out his phone, Dipper let out a groan. “I have no service,” he told Bill.

“You’re kidding,” Bill said.

“Nope,” Dipper said. “And there aren’t many people on this road, either. The last car we saw was that pickup truck. I bet that crate came from them.”

“We can just walk back to the gas station,” Bill suggested.

“Bill, we drove for at least 20 minutes after we left the gas station. We were traveling 50 MPH. The gas station has to be at least 15 miles from here. It would take us hours to get there. Is there anything you can do about this with your demon stuff?”

“Not really,” Bill sighed. “I mostly work with dimensional or mind stuff, you know? If it doesn’t involve going into someone’s head, going to a different dimension, or summoning fire, I can’t really help.”

“Could you, I don’t know, contact Mabel or something?”

“Not from this distance,” Bill said, shaking his head.

“Man. I was really looking forward to this,” Dipper said.

“It’s okay,” Bill assured him. “There’s still a chance we could make it to Portland. Even if we don’t, we still get to spend the day together.”

“Fair enough,” Dipper allowed. “Hey, do you want to get some of the snacks out while we wait for someone to come by? I’m getting a little hungry.”

“Sounds good to me,” Bill said. They got the cooler out of the backseat and set it on the trunk of the car. Before Dipper hopped up next to Bill, he popped open the hood of the car, remembering when his dad had told him that was one way to make sure people knew you were having car trouble if you needed help.

“You want to go ahead and break out the sandwiches or stick to the small stuff?” Bill asked.

“Let’s stick to the small stuff for now,” Dipper said. “We don’t know how long we’ll be here, and I want to be able to have those if we’re still stuck here at 3 in the afternoon.”

“Hey, at least the car still runs, even if we can’t drive it,” Bill pointed out. “If it rains or something, we don’t have to worry about getting sick. We just filled up, so gas isn’t an issue either if we want to crank it up.”

“That's true,” Dipper agreed. “Thanks for keeping it positive,” he said before, in a bold move, leaning over and pecking Bill on the cheek.

Bill’s face went red, and for once it wasn’t in anger. He stared at Dipper in shock, but the brunette was munching away on some potato chips like he hadn’t just made his heart start beating 90 miles an hour.

“What?” Dipper asked innocently when he noticed Bill staring.

“Nothing,” Bill denied, shaking his head. “I just wasn’t expecting that.”

“Was it okay?” Dipper asked, suddenly not so sure.

“It was great,” Bill said, perhaps a little too quickly. “It was great,” he repeated, more slowly and calmly.

Now Dipper was blushing, but that was okay. They were even now, he supposed. “What do you think we should do if no one comes by?” he asked, changing the subject.

“Let’s wait about 3 hours, maybe? If no one comes by before then, we’ll walk back in the direction of the gas station and see if we can’t pick up some cell reception somewhere. We don’t want to still be out here when it gets dark, and we don’t want your sister to get too worried when we don’t show up and don’t call.”

“That sounds good,” Dipper agreed, checking the time on his phone. It was almost 10:00. That would put them searching for help themselves by 1:00. It wasn’t bad. He knew they were on a back road, but he would honestly be surprised if _no one_ drove by for that long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what it's like where you are, but I know that where I live, there are some smaller highways that connect the big cities, and you might drive for hours and only pass two gas stations and a Dollar General, and you might not see another vehicle for hours - especially on a Sunday. I've never been to Oregon, but I assumed it probably has some roads like that. (If it doesn't, don't tell me.) Since we don't know where in Oregon Gravity Falls "actually is," I thought I'd take some liberty and assume there was some half-dead, two-lane road connecting it to Portland, and it's naturally the quickest route.
> 
> I have never actually been to Portland and I have no idea what it's like. If you couldn't tell, all of the things they had planned came straight from Google. If any of you are from Portland or have been there, please feel free to give me ideas for things for Bill and Dipper to try because they will eventually make it to Portland, just not yet. Also, if there is anything else you'd like to see, let me know. I can't make any promises because I do have a plan for this, but I want my readers to enjoy what I'm posting, too. Even if you just want to see more angst, or more fluff, or more both, just let me know and I can adjust.


End file.
